Let’s be honest: if forgetting what you were saying mid-thought was an Olympic sport, I’d have gold medals in every category. Freestyle Rambling. Synchronized Brain Fog. And my personal favorite: Disappearing Train of Thought With a Triple Mental Backflip.
People say “don’t be so hard on yourself,” and I’m like—buddy, I’m not. I’m just trying to remember what I came into this room for. And repeatedly. I’m not being ‘so hard’ on myself, I’d say I’m at least the appropriate level of hardness if not under lol
Somewhere between ADHD, fibromyalgia fog, bipolar whiplash, and a few hundred browser tabs in my brain, my inner monologue starts to sound like a dial-up modem trying to load a YouTube video. In 2003. On satellite internet. In a thunderstorm. A mile and a half down a country dirt road where theres NOTHING for miles
🧠 Exhibit A: “What Was I Saying?”
It’s not even a joke anymore. I’ll be mid-conversation, completely coherent, and suddenly—boom. Blank screen. I can literally see the words running off a cliff like cartoon lemmings.
“Wait—what was I saying?”
No really. What was I saying? I know its annoying to you, do you know how annoying it is and how much I absolutely hate the part of my brain thats supposed to remember things? Me and my brain are in an absolute love/hate relationship and we are definitely in our Hate each other era.
🤯 Fibro Fog: Not Just a Myth, Unfortunately
If you’ve never tried to function while your entire nervous system is on delay like it’s waiting for subtitles, congratulations—you’re not me. Fibro fog isn’t just forgetfulness. It’s walking into a room and standing there like you’re the main character in a slow-motion scene… except no one yelled “Action,” and you definitely missed your cue.
My body hurts, my thoughts hurt, my hair hurts, and occasionally my elbow forgets how to be an elbow. But hey, at least I still remember none of my passwords!
🎢 Bipolar Bonus: Now With Extra Whiplash!
Imagine being hyperfocused on color-coding your sock drawer one minute, then sobbing because your spoon fell on the floor the next. Now toss in some guilt about not replying to texts from 2017, and you’ve got the Bipolar Expansion Pack.
Highs that make you reorganize your pantry at 2 a.m., lows that make brushing your hair feel like a heroic feat. All while your memory plays musical chairs.
💁♀️ So What’s the Point?
The point is: if you’re out here trying your best with a glitchy brain, a misfiring mood system, and a body that acts like it was coded in beta—you’re not alone. You’re in deeply relatable, exhausted, beautifully chaotic company.
Some days I cry over spilled plans. Some days I laugh at my own internal commentary. And most days, I absolutely forget what I was saying.
But I’m still here. Still making stuff. Still showing up. Even if it’s ten minutes late and I forgot to put on pants. Til next time guys, take care of yourselves, and each other.
Welcome welcome one and all come on in. Its me —your neighborhood chronically exhausted gremlin with a nervous system that’s basically running Windows 95. If you’ve ever looked at your list of diagnoses and thought, “Cool, now I can collect the whole set,” then friend, pull up a chair and a heating pad. Today we’re talking about the beautiful disaster that is living with both fibromyalgia and bipolar disorder—aka “Mood Swings & Musculoskeletal Mayhem.”
I live it. I hate it. I laugh at it. Let’s go.
🎭 Act I: “What Fresh Hell Is This?”
So, first off: what the hell is fibromyalgia?
It’s that charming condition where your body interprets gentle breeze as blowtorch, basic fatigue as brain-dead exhaustion, and sleep as an optional luxury item from a catalog you can’t afford.
And bipolar disorder? Oh, that’s just where your brain slaps the gas and brake pedals randomly while you’re driving through Lifeville. Sometimes you feel like a goddess who could run a Fortune 500 company on three hours of sleep and a Red Bull. Other times, putting on socks feels like solving a Rubik’s cube blindfolded.
So what happens when you have both?
Well, according to a 2020 study in the Journal of Affective Disorders, roughly 32% of fibromyalgia patients also meet the criteria for bipolar disorder, compared to only 4.4% in the general population.
I would say I’m honored to be part of that elite club, but no one’s handing out free tote bags, just prescriptions and pity.
🧠 Act II: Pain Perception Is a Lying Liar
One of the cruelest things about this combo platter is how bipolar mood states can hijack your pain perception.
During manic or hypomanic episodes, people sometimes experience reduced sensitivity to pain, which sounds amazing until you realize it’s just your brain temporarily gaslighting you while it prepares to body slam you into a depressive episode later. A study published in Pain Practice found that manic states may suppress pain sensitivity, while depressive states amplify it. Seriously guys, this is real. Not saying its the same for everyone, but I had my hip REPLACED, and since I got home from the hospital I started like 5 new hobbies and don’t sit down more than 5 minutes a stretch lol. When asked if I hurt, I would answer yes, when I stop and put any thought to it I’m usually in the 5-7 range but when I distract myself I can go hours before I hurt so bad it will literally take my breath.
So some days, I’m cleaning the kitchen like a superhero with zero regard for my spine. Other days, I need a break halfway through brushing my teeth because my jaw hurts like I chewed concrete in my sleep. (Spoiler: I didn’t. Probably.)
⚖️ Act III: Treatment Is a Dumpster Fire of Trial and Error
If you’re wondering what it’s like to treat both bipolar and fibromyalgia, imagine playing Jenga on a trampoline.
You want something for the pain? Great! Depressed because ouch, it hurts. Well, chemical imbalance of the brain can be fixed right? Except—oops—some antidepressants often used for fibro (like SNRIs and SSRIs) can trigger manic episodes if you’re bipolar and not carefully mood-stabilized first. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3181950/A 2011 article in Dialogues in Clinical Neuroscience warned that antidepressant monotherapy in bipolar patients can significantly increase the risk of manic switches.
So, you try another med. That one numbs the pain but gives you brain fog so thick you forget where your fridge is. Or it stabilizes your mood but turns you into an emotionless zombie who eats beige food and says, “I’m fine” in a monotone voice while dying inside.
It’s fine. I’m fine. Everything’s… fine.
🧃 Act IV: The Emotional Toll of Being the Human Equivalent of a Glitchy App
Let’s not forget the emotional side. Chronic pain and bipolar disorder don’t just tag-team your physical body; they start squatting in your brain and charging rent. There’s grief for the person you used to be, guilt about being “too much” or “not enough,” and shame for not being able to manifest healing with gratitude journaling and kale smoothies.
Here’s the sciencey truth: a study in Arthritis Care & Research found that patients with fibromyalgia are 3.4 times more likely to have suicidal ideation, and bipolar disorder increases that risk even further. 🔗 Source
So no, you’re not just “being dramatic.” Your pain is real, your mood shifts are real, and your struggle is so valid it could be a thesis.
🎤 Curtain Call: Embrace the Chaos (or at Least Laugh at It)
Look, I didn’t sign up for this. No one hands you a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and fibromyalgia and says, “Congrats, you’ve unlocked hard mode—now go parent your autistic teen and try to cook something that isn’t beige.”
But I’m here. You’re here. We’re doing it—badly, weirdly, and with frequent snack breaks.
This dance between bipolar disorder and fibromyalgia is exhausting, confusing, and often unfair. But it’s not the end of the story. There’s still joy. There’s still meaning. And there’s still a damn good reason to keep showing up (even if it’s just for memes and microwave mashed potatoes).
So if you’re out there thinking, “Why is my body like this?”—just know you’re not alone. You’re part of a weird, wonderful, warrior community. We’re the ones limping into therapy with caffeine in one hand, a heating pad in the other, and a sarcastic one-liner ready to go.
And that, my friend, is something to be proud of. Til Next time gang take care of yourselves, and each other.
Sources for the Nerds Like Me(or your doctor who thinks you’re exaggerating): (full disclosure the sciencey stuff I googled and chat GPT’d the source links because its been a long time since I’ve had to cite things and I wanted to make sure I did it right.)
Di Salvo et al. (2020). Journal of Affective Disorders, “High prevalence of bipolar disorder in fibromyalgia patients” – PubMed
Dvir et al. (2011). Dialogues in Clinical Neuroscience, “Bipolar disorder: new strategies for treatment” – PMC
Lautenschlager, J. et al. (2005). Arthritis Care & Research, “Suicidal ideation and risk in fibromyalgia” – Wiley Online
Pain Practice, 2011. “Mood and pain: Depression, mania, and the modulation of physical suffering” – PubMed
(Or How I’m Not Crazy, Just Heavy On The Neurological Spice)
Let’s be real — the phrase “moody woman” gets tossed around more than a toddler’s sippy cup. It’s shorthand for “she had a valid emotional response, but it made me uncomfortable.” If I had a dollar for every time someone chalked up my reaction to hormones, I’d have enough to pay for all the meds that actually manage those moods.
Why “Mood Swings” Are More Than Just a Stereotype
Mood disorders like bipolar disorder, PMDD, and even ADHD-related emotional dysregulation affect hormone levels, executive function, and emotional processing.
A study published in the Journal of Affective Disorders found that emotional intensity and mood variability are frequently misinterpreted in women — especially when compared to men exhibiting the same symptoms.
Women are also more likely to be misdiagnosed with borderline personality disorder when they actually have bipolar II (source: Psychiatric Times, 2020).
Fact: I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder when I was 15, do you know how many legitimate concerns I’ve had brushed off because of that, or even Fibro, by doctors or medical professionals who should KNOW BETTER??? Not a little thats for sure, too many, yes I have neuro issues that doesnt mean I can’t have issues elsewhere, two things can be true.
The Cultural Bias Against Emotion
Reminder: anger, sadness, irritability — those aren’t “bad moods.” Those are data. Something’s happening in your environment, your body, or your brain chemistry.
We raise girls to be emotionally attuned, then weaponize that sensitivity against them as adults.
Being “too much” is just another way to shame someone for expressing a normal human emotion with intensity.
My English teachers would often tell me they loved my passion when I’d be sitting there crying because I remembered my Dad was dead after managing to feel normal for five minutes, then feeling guilty and mad at myself for feeling normal and not missing my Dad. I didn’t know how to express that sadness so I let her think the poems had moved me deeply. Then I felt guilty for not correcting her, it felt like she was giving me too much undeserved credit. It was cyclical.
Hormones Are Real, But They’re Not the Whole Story
Estrogen and serotonin are linked, and hormone changes do affect mood, but they don’t create mental illness out of thin air. They might exacerbate underlying issues, especially in people already dealing with bipolar disorder, ADHD, or CPTSD.
There’s a term for the way women’s pain and emotion are dismissed: “hysteria bias.” (Yes, it’s as fun as it sounds.)
Fact: One study in The Lancet Psychiatry (2019) confirmed women with bipolar disorder have a more depressive-dominant form, while men tend toward more manic episodes — yet men are still diagnosed earlier and taken more seriously.
Like I don’t want to call anyone out but ah, my hip has been messed up for YEARS, and multiple x-rays have showed it, yet my last doctor would go ‘ Well, with your fibro its hard to say….’ Um no it wasnt hard at all the next doctor didnt even have the x-ray dry before telling me how jacked up it was. Let me tell you, only YOU are going to prioritize your health, even if you have the best doc in the world who legitimately cares for you, you are still one of but many they think about, so if you are not looking out for and advocating for you then who is?
You’re Not Difficult — You’re Operating With Faulty Wiring and a Broken Support Manual
Stop apologizing for being “too sensitive” or “too much.” The world just hasn’t adapted to emotionally fluent people.
You aren’t broken. You’re just working with a neurochemical system that isn’t always on your side.
The myth of the difficult woman is a tool used to keep women quiet, compliant, and apologizing for their own damn nervous systems.
So the next time someone says you’re being moody, thank them. Because “moody” is just code for “having the guts to feel things deeply while still managing to feed a family, run a house, battle a diagnosis, and survive late-stage capitalism.” Call me moody again and I’ll invoice you for the unpaid therapy session you just triggered. Emotional depth isn’t a flaw — it’s a full-time job with no PTO.
Til Next Time Gang, take care of yourselves, and each other
There’s something almost intoxicating about hypomania. Your brain buzzes, ideas come faster than you can write them down, and suddenly everything feels possible. You’re cleaning the garage, starting a new project, texting friends back after weeks of silence, and maybe even feeling like you’ve finally “figured it out.”
But here’s the part people don’t talk about enough: what happens after.
When the sparkle fades and your energy crashes back to earth, you’re left sorting through the emotional and physical wreckage. It’s not just exhaustion—it’s this weird cocktail of regret, confusion, and grief. You might feel raw, embarrassed, or even guilty for things you said or started and couldn’t finish. That aftermath can be brutal.
Hypomania is part of bipolar II disorder—it’s marked by elevated mood, a surge in productivity, and bursts of creativity or restlessness. But while it can feel euphoric at the time, the come-down can leave you reeling, questioning your choices, and trying to clean up the mess your over-caffeinated brain tornadoed through.
The Cycle of Risk and Regret (a.k.a. Oops, I Did It Again — But Not in a Fun Britney Way)
Here’s the thing no one glamorizes about hypomania: the aftermath of impulsive choices that seemed like brilliant ideas at the time. One minute you’re ordering $200 worth of “self-improvement” stuff at 2 a.m., signing up for a new certification course, and texting your ex like you’re starring in your own comeback tour — and the next, you’re wondering what the hell just happened.
And science backs it up. According to research published on PubMed, people in hypomanic states often engage in high-risk behaviors — overspending, substance use, reckless decisions — the kind of things that feel like you’re chasing possibility, but too often watching it all boomerang back with the grace of a collapsing Jenga tower.
What follows? That slow, sinking feeling. Guilt. Shame. Maybe even avoidance. You look at the credit card bill, or a strained relationship, and suddenly the vibrant energy of hypomania gets replaced with the emotional hangover no one warned you about.
You’re not the only one who’s been caught in this loop. You’re not a bad person. You’re a person with a disorder that messes with impulse and inhibition. It doesn’t excuse the consequences, but it does explain the pattern — and understanding the pattern is how we start breaking it. I was so stuck here myself but perhaps worse is the gaslighting I do over EVERY. SINGLE. DECISION. afterwards because I sincerely have lost all faith in my own judgment. Like every little thing, ‘is it a good idea or are you just manic’ plays in my head on a loop.
The Crash Landing No One Talks About
If hypomania feels like flying a little too close to the sun, then the crash that follows is more than just a rough landing — it’s a total freefall. One minute, you’re bursting with ideas and energy, barely sleeping, maybe even reorganizing the garage at 2 a.m. like you’re possessed by the spirit of Marie Kondo on espresso. And then… it’s like the lights shut off. The energy vanishes. You’re not just tired — you’re hollowed out. The sadness is deep, the fatigue bone-heavy, and everything starts to feel like too much and not enough, all at once.
It’s not just a “mood swing.” It’s a full-body, full-mind shutdown that makes even brushing your teeth feel like a high-stakes negotiation. And the cruelest part? The contrast. You remember how you felt just days ago, and now you can’t fathom getting off the couch. That whiplash is its own kind of heartbreak. Like it physically makes me ache sometimes.
When Life Throws a Brick Through the Window
Here’s the thing: if you’re already dancing on the edge of a depressive episode, real-life chaos doesn’t just nudge you — it can send you tumbling. Research backs this up: negative life events (you know, the kinds that seem to show up all at once like uninvited guests) have been shown to intensify depressive symptoms in folks with bipolar disorder [PMC, Cleveland Clinic]. And if you’re someone already wired with a predisposition
to depression? That impact hits even harder. It’s why managing stress isn’t just a suggestion — it’s survival. I will legit cry over such trivial stuff, then hate myself cuz I KNOW its dumb to cry about it so I cry more cuz I’m mad at myself for not being able to look at a situation thats got nothing to do with me or so so trivial Learning how to soften life’s blows, build resilience, and stack the odds in your favor might not make the hard stuff disappear, but it can definitely make it hurt less when it lands.
Moving Forward: Strategies for Coping (AKA, Surviving the Crash Without Losing Your Damn Mind)
Look, managing life after hypomania is like waking up in a house you swore you just deep cleaned, only to find emotional dishes stacked in every room. But there are ways to climb out of the mess — even if you’re doing it one spoon at a time.
🔹 Self-Compassion This is not a personal failure, a moral shortcoming, or some character flaw you need to apologize for. It’s a medical condition — full stop. Remind yourself (repeatedly, if needed) that what you’re feeling isn’t your fault. You’re not broken, you’re human. In a world that crops all the edges to paint a rosier picture be the straight angle in black and white.
🔹 Structured Support When your brain feels like a Pinterest board of chaos, routines can become lifelines. Simple, repeatable actions — morning check-ins, meal planning, a therapy appointment every other Tuesday — can help stabilize the rollercoaster. And yes, professional help is allowed and encouraged (therapy = tools, not weakness). Every morning my routine has been the same for years, Duolingo while I listen to stand up comedy with the news in the background, if any of those is missing my day starts out lacking which leads to a bad day
🔹 Community Connection Even if you’re more “socially exhausted introvert” than “group hug enthusiast,” connecting with people who get it can make a huge difference. Whether it’s an online forum, a group chat, or that one friend who won’t judge your 2 a.m. existential texts — don’t go it alone. Thats what I’m trying to do here, build a community, hopefully to work right on up to a forum we can all support each other. Thats my goal anyway the minute I can sell enough in my store to pay to host the forum it will be done!
Understanding the highs and lows — especially the rough emotional terrain that can follow hypomania — isn’t just helpful, it’s empowering. When you mix solid science with self-awareness and some well-worn coping tools, you start to feel just a little more in control. Not perfect, not invincible — but stronger. And that counts. Til next time gang, take care of yourselves, and each other. P.S. If this hit a little close to home and you’re looking for something to help you process the messy in-between parts — I made a workbook just for this. It’s not magic, but it’s honest, helpful, and created by someone who’s been there. Check it out
Alright gang we’re about to dive into the wild world of Bipolar Disorder – it’s like a mood ring on steroids, but way less fun and a lot more “What the fuck is happening to me? Let’s get one thing straight: Bipolar Disorder isn’t just feeling a bit up and down. Oh no, that would be too simple. It’s more like your emotions decided to throw a rave in your brain, and everyone’s invited – from the life of the party (mania) to that one friend who always cries in the bathroom (depression).
Imagine a color spectrum, but instead of pretty rainbow colors, it’s various intensities of “Holy shit, what am I feeling?” On one end, we’ve got: Mania: The ultimate “hold my beer” moment. You’re invincible, you’re a genius, and sleep is for the weak. Example: Sarah decides to redecorate her entire house at 3 AM while simultaneously learning Mandarin and starting an online business. Because why the fuck not? Side note: I wanted to give a random example here with some off the wall stuff, but my moment of clarity and getting myself help was during a mania episode, I was up alone at 3 am, both (only two at the time) kids were curled up in my bed but I couldnt shut my brain off so I decided that would be the best time to SCRUB THE KITCHEN FLOOR WITH A TOOTH BRUSH. I didn’t remember the thought process, only that I can see clear as day in my mind the look up at the clock. The look down at the red toothbrush. The feeling like ‘I don’t think this is what normal people do AT ALL’. It was the catalyst to so much in my life, but thats not relevant here.
Hypomania: Mania’s slightly less unhinged cousin. You’re productive, creative, and feeling great! Until you’re not. Example: Mark starts a new business venture and is convinced he’ll be the next Elon Musk. Spoiler alert: He won’t be.
On the other end, we’ve got:
Depression: When your bed becomes your best friend and showering feels like climbing Mount Everest. Example: Emily can’t remember the last time she changed her underwear, and at this point, she’s too afraid to check. But wait, there’s more! Because Bipolar Disorder loves to keep us on our toes, it throws in a fun little twist called:
Mixed Episodes: When Your Brain Can’t Decide Which Flavor of Crazy to Be Imagine having all the energy of George on espresso but with the mood of a wet cat. That’s a mixed episode for you. It’s like your brain is playing ping pong with your emotions, and you’re the ball.You might feel:
Like you could run a marathon, but also like you want to cry while doing it.
Full of brilliant ideas, but too exhausted to even write them down.
Ready to take on the world, but also like the world is out to get you.
It’s a special kind of hell where you’re simultaneously too much and not enough.
Coping with this Shitshow So, how do we deal with this emotional dumpster fire? Here are some ideas that might help (no promises, though):
Meds: Because sometimes your brain needs a chemical babysitter.
Therapy: For when you need to vent to someone who’s legally obligated to listen.
Support Network: Find your tribe of fellow chaos enthusiasts who get it.
Remember gang, Bipolar Disorder is different for everyone. It’s like a fingerprint, but instead of being useful for identification, it just makes your life interesting in ways you never asked for. It’s like being on an emotional rollercoaster designed by Salvador Dali. It’s complex, it’s challenging, and it’s uniquely yours.
Now go forth, you spectacular screw-ups, and embrace your personal brand of beautiful chaos. Because in the end, we’re all just trying to navigate this wild ride called life – some of us just have more frequent and intense side quests. Take care of yourself, and each other.
If you are anything like me, you are tired of your brain performing a never-ending karaoke of that one lyric you know from the song that topped the charts before you were born on constant repeat (I swear I hit shuffle, the button must be stuck!) Sick of your mind treating bedtime like it’s an all-night rave? Well, folks, step right up to the Insomniac’s Club, where fibromyalgia, ADHD, and bipolar mixed episodes collide in a spectacular display of sleeplessness!
But wait, there’s more! Call now, and we’ll throw in a complimentary course on “Quiet Mindfulness for the Chronically Unquiet Mind”! Yes, you heard that right! For the low, low price of your sanity, you too can learn how to navigate the treacherous waters of pain, restlessness, and mood swings while desperately trying to catch some Z’s.
Order in the next 10 minutes, and we’ll even include our patented “Emotional Roller Coaster Survival Kit”! Don’t delay – supplies are limited, but unfortunately, your symptoms aren’t!
(Disclaimer: Side effects may include sarcasm, eye-rolling, and the sudden urge to laugh hysterically at 4 AM. Quiet mindfulness not guaranteed. Actual sleep sold separately.)
Start Small: Begin with 5-10 minutes of deep breathing. It’s like dipping your toe in the mindfulness pool before cannonballing into the deep end of enlightenment.
Guided Meditation: Find a meditation guide who sounds less like a soothing forest nymph and more like a drill sergeant for your attention span.
Breath Awareness: Count your breaths. Lose count. Start over. Repeat until you either achieve nirvana or fall asleep trying. Or pass out. There are multiple options.
Create a Routine: Make mindfulness as routine as your morning coffee. Maybe you’ll remember to do it as often as you forget where you put your keys.
Grounding Techniques: When your mind’s doing the Macarena, focus on physical sensations. Like how your butt’s falling asleep from sitting still for so long.
Mindful Movement: Try yoga or tai chi. Because nothing says “inner peace” like pretzel-twisting yourself while trying not to fall over.
Set Realistic Goals: Celebrate small wins. Did you meditate for a whole minute without planning your grocery list? Gold star for you!
Use Technology: Download mindfulness apps. Now you have one more thing to distract you from actually being mindful. Irony, thy name is ADHD.
Seek Professional Help: Find a therapist who specializes in herding cats… I mean, focusing ADHD and bipolar minds.
Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself when you inevitably get distracted by a squirrel outside your window. Or was that just me?
Remember, finding quiet mindfulness with ADHD and bipolar is like trying to nail Jell-O to a tree – messy, frustrating, but potentially hilarious. Keep at it, you beautiful chaos machines. Who knows? You might just stumble into enlightenment while looking for your lost shoe. If you find it though, send up a bat signal or something, trail of breadcrumbs so the rest of us can find our way too. Til next time gang, take care of yourself, and each other!
Alright, you beautiful disasters, strap in for a wild ride through the shit show that is Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) with ADHD. RSD refers to an intense emotional response or pain triggered by feelings of perceived rejection, criticism, or failure. It is commonly associated with conditions like ADHD and is characterized by an extreme sensitivity to perceived interpersonal rejection or negative feedback. This emotional response can be disproportionate to the situation and may manifest as feelings of deep hurt, sadness, anger, or even physical discomfort in response to what others might consider minor or routine interactions. It’s like emotional Russian roulette, but instead of a bullet, it’s loaded with crippling self-doubt and the overwhelming urge to crawl into a hole and die. I think to a degree we all fall somewhere in the grey area on RSD, none of us are exactly overjoyed with criticism, but for people with RSD, that critique doesn’t just glance off the ego like a missed catch, it bowls us over like a cannon ball to the gut.
Picture this: You’re strutting through life, feeling like hot shit, when BAM! Someone doesn’t immediately want to be your best friend, and suddenly you’re spiraling faster than a drunk squirrel on a merry-go-round. Welcome to the fucked-up world of RSD, where every minor setback feels like the universe is personally telling you to go fuck yourself. (This is George’s girlfriend Gracie. She likes to get a little bit tipsy)
RSD, or as I lovingly call it, the “Why Does Everyone Hate Me?” syndrome, is like having a superpower you never asked for and definitely don’t want. It’s not just feeling a bit bummed when things don’t go your way. Oh no, it’s a full-on emotional tsunami that leaves you wondering if you should just say “fuck it” and become a hermit in the woods.
The experts (bless their hearts for trying to understand our chaos) reckon RSD is our brain’s way of saying, “Hey, let’s make this bitch suffer!” It’s often found partying hard with its BFF, ADHD, like two drunk frat boys wreaking havoc on your emotional stability. Why? Because apparently, our brains are wired to be drama queens. So next time you’re ugly crying because your cat looked at you funny, remember – it’s not you, it’s your fucked-up neural pathways!
Living with RSD is like trying to navigate a minefield while drunk and blindfolded. You never know when some innocent comment will trigger a meltdown that makes soap opera stars look emotionally stable. But don’t worry, there are coping strategies! Take a deep breath (or chug a glass of wine, no judgment here), remind yourself that not everyone is plotting your demise, and maybe invest in a punching bag for those moments when you need to physically beat the shit out of your feelings. In conclusion, Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria is the uninvited asshole at your emotional party – it shows up unannounced, drinks all your booze, and leaves you questioning your life choices. But hey, it’s a reminder that our brains are wonderfully fucked up, even if they sometimes make us feel like we’re starring in our own personal tragicomedy.So, the next time RSD comes knocking, tell it to fuck right off, grab some popcorn (or tequila), and enjoy the shitshow. Remember, you’re not alone on this batshit crazy roller coaster of rejection. We’re all in this together, you magnificent train wrecks!And that’s a fucking wrap! Til next time gang, take care of yourself, and each other! (BTW George asked if you’d keep an eye out for Gracie, he lost track of her after she put the lamp shade on her head and started singing Milkshake!)
Folks tonight, in the ‘if I don’t laugh I’ll cry category, welcome to ‘My brain is a sieve and I can’t remember shit’. I know you guys get it, it happens to all of us as we get older, but man you add fibro fog, mania, and ADHD and you’ve got a special kind of mush don’t you? Welcome to the club, where we’re all annoying as hell, but no one’s more pissed off about it than we are!
Let’s start with the classic “I Know Things But Can’t Remember Them When I Need To” syndrome. You know, that delightful phenomenon where your brain is like a squirrel hoarding nuts, except instead of nuts it’s random facts, and instead of finding them when winter comes, they’re lost in the abyss of your mind. It’s like having a library where all the books are constantly rearranging themselves. Fun times! Or how about when you sit straight up in bed some random Thursday at 1:25 in the morning and suddenly someone let the tap that keeps the fun facts all neat and tidy loose and you remember your 4th grade best friend’s dog’s name. Not at all needed or wanted info, but you’ve got that shit at the ready should it ever prove useful.
Then there’s the “I Just Met You And I’ve Already Forgotten Your Name” dance. Oh, the joys of introducing yourself to someone, having a whole conversation, and then realizing you have no clue who the hell they are five minutes later. It’s like your brain has a “delete recent history” button that gets hit every time you meet someone new. Sorry, not sorry, Karen… or was it Susan? Is it awkward to ask the name of someone? How about mid convo? How about for the fourth time? How about when you are so focused on remembering their name that you don’t listen to anything they said because you were too busy committing the name to memory? See? Annoying, well aware, but any way you look at it its going to be awkward so you just gotta pick your awkward lol.
This segues perfectly into our next category “Words Go In But Understanding Takes A Vacation” experience. You know, when someone’s talking to you and you’re nodding along like one of those bobblehead dogs, but your brain is still buffering like a 90s internet connection. By the time you’ve processed what they’ve said, they’re three topics ahead and you’re left wondering if you accidentally time-traveled.
Now, I don’t know the fancy scientific terms for these delightful quirks of cognition. Maybe it’s some flavor of ADHD, a dash of anxiety, or just good old-fashioned “my brain likes to fuck with me” syndrome. Whatever it is, it’s about as welcome as a porcupine in a balloon factory.
The real kicker? We know we’re annoying people. We see the eye rolls, the sighs, the “I just told you this five minutes ago” looks. But trust me, no one is more annoyed than we are. It’s like being trapped in a sitcom where you’re both the bumbling character AND the frustrated audience.
So, to all my fellow memory-challenged, slow-processing, name-forgetting comrades out there, I salute you. We may be annoying as hell, but at least we’re consistent about it. And hey, if people get too fed up with us, chances are we’ll forget about it anyway!
Remember (ha!), you’re not alone in this cognitive clusterfuck. We’re all just doing our best to navigate a world that expects us to remember things, process information quickly, and not look like a deer in headlights during casual conversation. So cut yourself some slack, embrace the chaos, and maybe invest in some name tags.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go figure out who the hell I was talking to earlier and why I have a reminder on my phone that just says “purple elephant banana split.” Notes only work if they make sense people lol. Wish me luck! Til next time, take care of yourself, and each other!
Buckle up, because we’re about to dive headfirst into the batshit crazy world of navigating bipolar mania, fibromyalgia, and ADHD all at once. It’s a three-ring circus of creativity, pain, and squirrel-like attention spans that’ll make your head spin faster than a fucking top.
Way Down We Go is right!
Let’s start with the highs of bipolar mania, shall we? Imagine your brain as a pinball machine on steroids, ricocheting from one grandiose idea to the next with the force of a supernova. Every neuron is firing PURE GOLD, you’re a veritable fountain of creativity, spewing out ambitious plans and innovative concepts like a deranged Dr. Seuss on crack. The energy is intoxicating, the possibilities endless, and you’re ready to conquer the world with your sheer force of will (and maybe a touch of delusion).
But just as you’re revving up to change the course of human history, fibromyalgia comes crashing in like a drunk party guest, often giving you the coordination of one as well. Suddenly, every movement feels like you’re being stabbed by a thousand tiny knives, and even the simple act of getting out of bed becomes a Herculean feat of endurance. It’s like your body is actively sabotaging your mind’s grand schemes, leaving you to navigate the treacherous waters of creativity while battling a constant companion of pain and fatigue.
And just when you thought things couldn’t get any more chaotic, ADHD decides to join the party, bringing its own special brand of chaos to the mix. Suddenly, your pinball brain is not only ricocheting from one idea to the next but also careening off in a million different directions at once. Focusing on a single task becomes a Sisyphean struggle, as your attention span rivals that of a caffeinated toddler on a sugar high. (I’m really pleased with how that graphic came out. Thats right folks, I pick something for each paragraph and find and customize it myself, I’m a nerd lol)
But fear not, my fellow warriors, for we are nothing if not resilient AF. We may be a hot mess of contradictions, but we’re also a force to be reckoned with when it comes to navigating this twisted labyrinth of creativity and challenges.
First and foremost, self-awareness is key. We’ve got to learn to recognize the signs and symptoms of each condition, so we can manage them like the badass bosses we are. When the mania starts veering towards impulsivity, it’s time to rein that shit in. When the fibromyalgia pain is threatening to derail our productivity, we adapt and conquer.
Next up, we’ve got to embrace our creative outlets while setting some damn boundaries. Sure, we’re bursting with ideas and ambitions, but we’ve also got to break that shit down into manageable steps. Bite-sized chunks of creativity, if you will, that our ADHD brains can actually focus on without getting distracted by the next shiny object that catches our eye.
And let’s not forget the importance of taking care of our physical and mental health, shall we? Proper rest, nutrition, and exercise can work wonders in mitigating the symptoms of both fibromyalgia and ADHD. Throw in some mindfulness practices like meditation and yoga, and we might just achieve a semblance of inner peace amidst the chaos.
But let’s be real, we can’t do this shit alone. That’s why we’ve got to enlist the help of professionals – therapists, specialists, and anyone else who can help us navigate this twisted labyrinth of conditions. They’re like our own personal Sherpas, guiding us through the treacherous terrain of our own minds and bodies.
At the end of the day, living with bipolar mania, fibromyalgia, and ADHD is a fucking testament to our resilience and strength. We’re a bunch of creative badasses who refuse to let our challenges define us. Sure, it’s a wild ride filled with ups, downs, and more twists and turns than a soap opera plot line, but we wouldn’t have it any other way. So let’s embrace the complexity, embody the resilience, and keep on creating our own unique brand of chaos – one delightfully twisted day at a time. Til next time gang, take care of yourself, and each other!
I don’t hide where I’m at, smack dab in the middle of a mixed episode and HATING my brain SO MUCH. My mania is making me feel like I don’t have a brain in my head, I can’t retain anything. Imagine your brain is a circus, and the clowns are on a fucking bender. That’s what it’s like living with this bipolar bullshit, especially during these delightful episodes. My mind goes into hyperdrive, spewing out ideas faster than a fucking fire hose. It’s a shitshow, I tell ya.
When the mania hits, it’s like someone cracked open a can of crazy in my skull. Thoughts come barreling in like a herd of rabid elephants, trampling over any semblance of sanity. Business plans, artistic endeavors, get-rich-quick schemes—you name it, my brain vomits it out in rapid-fire succession. It’s a damn three-ring fuckery of creativity and chaos.
The ideas keep coming, faster than I can process them. It’s like trying to catch a swarm of angry bees with a butterfly net. By the time I’ve grasped one brilliant concept, ten more have already buzzed off into the ether. Some are pure gold, others are just steaming piles of shit, but who has the time to sort it all out?
In the midst of this mental maelstrom, I inevitably drop the ball. Brilliant ideas slip through the cracks, overshadowed by the constant barrage of thoughts. It’s like trying to pick out a needle in a haystack made of needles. Frustrating as hell, let me tell ya. Sometimes, I’ll have a moment of clarity, a flash of pure genius that could change the world. But by the time I’ve finished patting myself on the back, that stroke of brilliance has already been flushed down the toilet of my mind, lost forever in the swirling vortex of mania.
So, how do I deal with this shitstorm of thoughts? Well, I’ve tried journaling, but half the time, I can’t even read my own damn handwriting. Routines and schedules? Yeah, right, like that’s gonna tame this wild beast of a brain. Nah, my coping strategy is simple: embrace the chaos, ride the wave of insanity, and hope I don’t drown in the process.
Look, living with bipolar disorder is a fucking rollercoaster ride through the depths of hell and the heights of mania. The racing thoughts are just one twisted loop in this crazy-ass journey. But you know what? I wouldn’t have it any other way. Sure, it’s a shitshow, but it’s my shitshow, and I’m gonna own it with all the creative, energetic moxy and humor I can muster. So, buckle up, folks, and get ready for the ride of your life. It’s gonna be a wild one, but at least we’ll have a few laughs along the way. And who knows? Maybe amidst all the chaos, I’ll stumble upon the next million-dollar idea. Or maybe I’ll just end up talking to myself in a padded room. Either way, it’s gonna be one hell of a fucking adventure. Buckle up! Til next time gang, take care of yourself, and each other.
WannaBeNormal 