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7 Small Wins That Totally Count as Achievements in The Holiday Season

Listen… December is basically the season finale of the year, and my brain is running on whatever scraps of battery life it can find between the couch cushions. So instead of pretending I’m a fully optimized human being, I’m embracing the tiny victories — the ones that actually count.

Because if December can be dramatic?
I can be delusional in a way that helps my self-esteem.

We all know (and we’ve talked about) December is an energy zapper so here are 7 small wins that absolutely deserve applause, confetti, or at least a slow clap from someone who isn’t judging your life choices:


1. Getting dressed in something that isn’t your “I Give Up” sweatpants

Bonus points if the outfit has textures like velvet and lace, because then you’re basically cosplaying as an enchanted woodland witch who is absolutely doing her best. I’m a cross between Stevie Nicks and a victorian ghost as far as style goes. I want people to see me and feel the energy shift because I am all about delivering the good vibes.


2. Remembering one (1) single appointment

In December? That’s Nobel Prize-level discipline. Congratulations on defeating the Calendar Boss. The other appointments are jealous but hey, you crushed that lunch date.


3. Feeding yourself something other than peppermint bark

Double win if it was an actual meal. Triple win if you didn’t eat it standing in the kitchen like a tired Victorian ghost. I want people to know I am absolutely not going to be a quiet ghost. No slipping in or out of places unnoticed. I’m going to be LOUD, think of my entrances and exits to resemble Kramer’s from Seinfeld.


4. Wrapping at least one gift without crying

Or using a gift bag instead of trying to precision-fold paper like Martha Stewart with a migraine. Embrace the bag. The bag is your friend. I havent wrapped a gift in forever, the muscle memory is gone.


5. Making it through a school concert, holiday party, or work event

Even if your soul left your body three minutes in, you showed up. Gold star. I make disassociating an Olympics level sport. If you see me at an event, think of that as a premeeting and I’ll be asking all my follow up questions when I see you next and might lag on a convo or two while my brain is processing.


6. Saying “no” to something your body and brain didn’t have the spoons for

This is Advanced Seasonal Adulting™. Look at you, protecting your peace like a tiny holiday dragon guarding its hoard. I will protect my peace, because I have to listen to me when everything is quiet.


7. Remembering joy is allowed to be small right now

A quiet night. A cup of cocoa. A silly ornament. Five minutes under a blanket with the lights off. Its unreal how long I could sit and watch the tree change color while memories play like a slideshow in my head.
Tiny joy counts — especially when December tries to steamroll you.


If you’ve done even one of these things?
You’re winning. Seriously. December doesn’t want us to succeed, and yet here we are — thriving at a very reasonable, spoon-conscious pace. Til next time gang, take care of yourselves, and each other. Holiday greetings from George!)

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7 Conversations I’ve Had With Myself This Week

Look, I talk to myself. A lot. And not in the cute “oh, I’m just thinking out loud” way that neurotypical people do. I’m talking full-blown conversations, complete with tone changes, arguments, and occasionally losing said arguments to myself. If you have ADHD, chronic illness, or just a generally chaotic brain, you know exactly what I’m talking about.

Here are seven actual conversations I’ve had with myself this week. I’m not proud of most of them, but I’m also not surprised by any of them.

1. The Medication Negotiation

Me at 8 AM: “Okay, time to take your pills.”

Also me: “But do I really NEED them today? I feel fine.”

Me: “You feel fine BECAUSE of the pills, you absolute potato.”

Also me: “But what if I’ve been healed by positive thinking and I don’t need them anymore?”

Me: “We’ve been through this. Take the damn pills.”

Also me: “Fine, but I’m not happy about it.”

[Takes pills]

Me, two hours later when brain fog hits: “Why didn’t I take my pills on time?”

Also me: “…We literally just had this conversation.”

2. The Food Decision Paralysis

Me, standing in kitchen: “I should eat something.”

Also me: “Agreed. What do we want?”

Me: “I don’t know, what sounds good?”

Also me: “Nothing sounds good.”

Me: “Okay, what do we HAVE?”

Also me: “Everything and nothing.”

Me: “That’s not helpful.”

Also me: “Neither is staring into the fridge like it’s going to solve our problems.”

Me: “What if we just eat cereal again?”

Also me: “We had cereal for dinner last night.”

Me: “Your point?”

[Grabs bowl]

3. The Task Initiation Battle

Me: “I need to start that thing.”

Also me: “Which thing?”

Me: “You know, THE thing. The important thing.”

Also me: “Oh right. When are we doing that?”

Me: “Now. We’re doing it now.”

Also me: “But first, let me just check my phone real quick.”

Me: “NO. We’re not doing this.”

Also me: “Just one quick scroll.”

Me: “It’s never one quick scroll and you know it.”

Also me: “But what if someone texted us?”

Me: “They didn’t.”

Also me: “But what if they did and it’s urgent?”

Me: “FINE. Five minutes.”

[Three hours later]

Me: “We never started the thing, did we?”

Also me: “…In our defense, we learned a lot about seahorse reproduction.”

4. The Sleep Schedule Delusion

Me at 9 PM: “We should go to bed.”

Also me: “But I’m not tired.”

Me: “We’re never tired at bedtime. That’s literally our thing.”

Also me: “What if tonight is different?”

Me: “It’s not. Go to bed.”

Also me: “But what if I just scroll for a bit and THEN go to bed?”

Me: “That has literally never worked.”

Also me: “There’s a first time for everything.”

[At 2 AM]

Me: “I hate us.”

Also me: “Same.”

5. The Executive Function Check-In

Me: “Have we showered today?”

Also me: “…Define ‘today.'”

Me: “The current 24-hour period.”

Also me: “Then no.”

Me: “What about yesterday?”

Also me: “I plead the fifth.”

Me: “We need to shower.”

Also me: “That sounds like a lot of steps.”

Me: “It’s literally just standing in water.”

Also me: “Yeah, but first we have to DECIDE to shower, then remember to shower, then actually GET IN the shower, then remember what order the shower things go in…”

Me: “Okay I see your point.”

Also me: “Plus we’d have to find a clean towel.”

Me: “Never mind. We’ll shower tomorrow.”

Also me: “Bold of you to assume tomorrow will be any different.”

6. The Pain Scale Debate

Me: “Ow.”

Also me: “What’s the pain level?”

Me: “I don’t know, like a 6?”

Also me: “Is it though? Remember that time we thought 7 was bad and then we had that 9?”

Me: “Good point. Maybe it’s a 5.”

Also me: “But if it’s a 5, should we take pain meds?”

Me: “I don’t know, what if it gets worse and we already used up our meds?”

Also me: “But what if we DON’T take meds and it gets worse anyway?”

Me: “What if we just suffer through it and prove we’re tough?”

Also me: “That sounds like internalized ableism.”

Me: “You’re right. Okay, taking meds.”

Also me: “Wait, did we already take meds today?”

Me: “…I don’t remember.”

Also me: “Cool, cool. This is fine. Everything is fine.”

7. The Bedtime Existential Crisis

Me at 1 AM: “Why are we like this?”

Also me: “Like what?”

Me: “You know… LIKE THIS. The chaos. The forgetting. The talking to ourselves at 1 AM.”

Also me: “It’s not our fault our brain is wired differently.”

Me: “I know, but sometimes I wish we were just… normal.”

Also me: “Normal people are boring.”

Me: “Normal people remember to pay bills on time.”

Also me: “Okay, fair point.”

Me: “Normal people don’t have to negotiate with themselves about basic tasks.”

Also me: “But would we really want to be normal if it meant losing our creativity? Our hyperfocus superpowers? Our ability to make connections nobody else sees?”

Me: “…Are you just trying to make us feel better?”

Also me: “Is it working?”

Me: “A little.”

Also me: “Then yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing.”

Me: “We should probably go to sleep.”

Also me: “Agreed. Right after we Google one quick thing.”

Me: “We both know that’s a lie.”

Also me: “And yet here we are.”


The Conclusion I Didn’t Ask For

The truth is, talking to myself has become such a normal part of my life that I forget other people don’t do this. Or at least, they don’t do it out loud. Or with multiple distinct personalities arguing about whether cereal counts as dinner.

But here’s the thing: these internal (and sometimes external) conversations are how my brain processes things. It’s how I work through decisions, remember tasks, and occasionally talk myself into doing basic human functions like showering and eating vegetables.

Is it weird? Absolutely. Is it exhausting? You have no idea. Would I change it if I could?

Ask me again after I’ve had some sleep. And by sleep, I mean after I finish this one last Google search about whether other people have full conversations with themselves or if I should be concerned. Til next time gang, take care of yourself, and each other.

[Spoiler alert: I Googled it. It’s apparently normal. We’re fine. Probably.]

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The Great Household Item Hide & Seek (and the Conversations I’ve Had With Myself While Looking for Them)

You know how some people lose themselves in books or meditation? Yeah, not me. I lose myself in a daily game of hide & seek with my household items. Keys, phones, socks, remotes, pens — all apparently sentient and united in their mission to make me look ridiculous.

What makes it worse? The conversations I have with myself while I’m searching. Spoiler: I’m both the villain and the detective, and I’m never kind to myself in either role.

Here’s a peek into the thrilling mysteries that unfold in my home:


🧦 The Missing Socks Saga

One sock left in the dryer, the other AWOL.

Me: “Did I put this in the laundry?”
Also me: “Nope, it was definitely in the drawer.”
Me: “So… abducted by aliens?”
Also me: “Or maybe it’s sipping espresso in Paris while you walk around like a mismatched peasant.”

Result: I usually find it way too late — after my daughter has cut it into an art project, or the cat has been subjected to a “custom sweater” that was three sizes too small.


📱 The Vanishing Phone Mystery

My phone disappears precisely when I’m already late.

Me: “I know I set it down… somewhere.”
Also me: “Maybe in the fridge? You’ve done worse.”
Me: “I don’t know! I don’t know anything anymore! This is how the chaos wins.”
Also me: “Honestly, you’d be late even if it was taped to your forehead.”


📺 The Remote’s Secret Life

The remote hides in plain sight: under cushions, in laundry baskets, behind the cat.

Me: “This remote is plotting against me.”
Also me: “Yep, it’s basically Loki in plastic form.”
Me: “It knows I want to binge my show. This is betrayal on a molecular level.”
Also me: “Face it, the remote has stronger boundaries than you do.”


✨ Bonus Round – The Usual Suspects

Pens that vanish. Hair ties that escape. Phone chargers that ghost me like a bad date.

Me: “Is it under the bed, on the counter, or did it grow legs?”
Also me: “Nah, it packed a bag and joined the circus.”
Me: “Fine. I’ll just survive off raw anxiety.”
Also me: “Cool, that’s basically your whole lifestyle brand anyway.”


The Takeaway

Somewhere between yelling at invisible forces and negotiating with the cat, I’ve realized: maybe this is just normal. Maybe everyone’s household is secretly playing hide & seek with their sanity. Also me is a comedy genius lol.

Or maybe I’m just cursed.

Either way, I’m declaring a truce. But first… coffee. Definitely coffee.


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A Grown-Up Juice Box and Other Things I Wish Existed Today

Survival & Sanity Edition

Some days, I just need something to fix everything instantly.
A nap. A hug. A reset button. A very large grilled cheese that appears by yelling “Grilled cheese!”

Since none of that magically appeared (yet), here’s my list of things I wish existed today. Feel free to add yours in the comments, because I know I’m not the only one on the edge.


🌈 Today’s Top 10 Things That Should Exist But Don’t:

  1. A grown-up juice box with electrolytes, magnesium, and a splash of wine. Or beer. Or a shot of Jack lol it depends on the day.
  2. A “No One Is Allowed to Ask Me Anything Today” hat—everyone must obey it. Also on a related note, a personal bubble. Let those suckers keep their distance .
  3. A teleporting weighted blanket that hugs you and then disappears before you get too hot. Does anyone’s body temp go wonky with sleep deprivation or high anxiety? No just me? Sweet! It actually makes me have a physical ‘flush’
  4. An adult-sized baby swing that rocks you while playing lo-fi beats and whispering “you’re doing great.” Maybe music instead of the whispering, that actually sounds a little creepy lol but I’m down for the swings! Hubby even has hooks indoors to hang hammocks sometimes the swinging or rocking repetitive motion helps.
  5. A “pause the world” button. Just for an hour. Or a week. It was kind of like that when I was in the coma, don’t recommend that route.
  6. A clone who does your grocery shopping and argues with the insurance company for you. Use what you’ve got though, we do pick up whenever possible even if we plan on going inside, its easier to manage the list, keeps things a little more organized.
  7. A universal “I’m spiraling, treat me gently” badge that everyone understands. Or don’t understand, just respect others feelings, that shouldnt even have to be a wish, but its not exactly great out there.
  8. An emotional support burrito that is also a functioning therapist. Or tacos! Emotional support tacos with some frozen margs lol.
  9. A magic snack drawer that restocks with your comfort food daily (and knows your allergies). Cool ranch on lock!
  10. A panic shutoff switch. Like a car alarm button, but for your brain. A pause? Maybe just not a multi party pile up on the everything all at once highway lol
  11. A fidget suit. I would straight up rock that thing at every opportunity. Imagine: a soft, cozy hoodie with textured sleeves, loops to tug on, snap buttons, zipper pulls, maybe even little hidden squeeze pouches and stretchy straps to tug when you’re crawling out of your own skin, I can tell you how often the panic will come over me at night and the only thing that helps is hopping out of bed and MOVING. Oh and POCKETS.
  12. Weighted curtains for your brain, you pull them closed and suddenly outside voices get quiet, to-do lists stop screaming, and it’s like a sensory hug for your overstimulated self.
    Bonus: blocks gaslighting and unsolicited advice.
  13. A Spoon Dispenser lol you swipe a card or breathe into it, and if it senses you’ve been emotionally juggling chainsaws, it gives you five extra spoons for the day. So many days I’d give my last penny for a spoon lol
  14. Memory foam couch that holds you like a mom, it knows when you’re about to cry and reclines automatically. One arm dispenses hot tea, the other tucks a weighted blanket around you.
    Available in “Smells Like Cookies” and “Washes Your Hair Energy.”
    Limited edition comes with caffeine mist and validation.

Whether it’s imaginary inventions or real-deal coping tools, the truth is we’re all just trying to patch together peace in a loud, messy world. Some days we thrive. Some days we spiral in our soft pants and pray the coffee kicks in before the anxiety does. Either way, you’re not alone in this. You never were.

So take your meds, drink some water, and rest when you need to. Find something small to laugh about if you can. And remember: survival is still survival, even when it’s messy.

Take care of yourselves—and each other.

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Lessons from My Cat: What My Furry Therapist Taught Me About Mindfulness

Sorry for my absence, I can’t think past the dark place, it swallows all rational thinking so I would be careful taking advice from me, but hey I’m honest. I’m trying to keep putting one foot in front of the other because as people, its just what we have to do, but every day seems like I’m sliding down deeper into the darkness. So I’ve been trying to be more than I am, but it hurts more every day. If you ever feel like that, like your best is never going to cut it, now or ever in the past or the future, just know you arent alone and its ok to sometimes not be ok. Drop me an email or message and I’ll absolutely sit in the dark with you. Since I’ve been feeling so shitty, I can’t help but think back on all the ways Ding impacted my life and what I learned from her and her brothers and sisters who went before her.

Be Present in the Moment
Cats are masters of living in the now. Whether they’re basking in a sunbeam or pouncing on a toy, they fully immerse themselves in the experience. Ding absolutely was present in the moment, especially in her old age lol she forgot things faster than a goldfish. I tried to put her in the sunbeam on her last day with us, that was her thing, when she didnt perk up I know the end was upon us.

Embrace Naps as Self-Care
Your cat knows the importance of rest. When she curls up for a nap, it’s a reminder that self-care is essential. This new kitten, I swear he’s got a form of kitty narcolepsy, he passes out in the strangest places and positions, like he can be mid movement and lay close his eyes and just be OUT lol. His predecessor Bonkers who looked nearly identical did the same thing, but this one’s favorite spot appears to be crawled up on me and bury himself under my neck into my hair.

Savor Your Food
Cats take their time when eating, savoring each bite. They remind us to slow down and appreciate our meals rather than rushing through them. Ding certainly embodied this lesson. For the last year, she had a spot we were pretty sure was cancer, as old as she was I wasnt going to put her through anything traumatic, but she stopped eating regular food more than a year ago. For a full year, she sat in her bed, at my elbow, which she’d yell at me so I got her eating cat TREATS instead of food and she liked it so much we just kept feeding her handfuls. Of course it also meant one of us always had to be here so we had to take separate family trips last year, not just Ding actually Dorian and Isaac couldnt eat regular food and needed to be medicated a few times a day. I’m hopeful that we have gotten them past the worst of it.

Play Like Nobody’s Watching
Cats can turn anything into a toy and find joy in playtime. They teach us to let go of inhibitions and have fun, even as adults. Ding was like a kitten when catnip or the dot broke out, I can generally get all of them to chase it, she’d go so hard at it lol, that was HER dot until maybe six months ago when she stopped playing, well into when we knew she didnt have much time left, she played. My cats before her usually had a particular thing they’d always play with. I remember Carmen, hubby’s cat for about as long as I had Ding, was old and cranky but if I was making the bed, she was there as I smoothed the sheet out. Ding highly recommended the dot (laser pointer) I used to let her get it sometimes and the look she’d give me lol like she was saying ‘yeah I know you are letting me get it and I don’t care’ lol.

Stretch It Out
Cats are champions of stretching, and they remind us to listen to our bodies and take care of our physical health. I don’t know that I FIRST learned it from cats, back in my younger days I did gymnastics, but a few years ago I was trying to lose weight and whenever I’d get down on the floor to do some basic stretches or yoga she’d flop down beside me. She would lay on her back while I did sit-ups or my leg stretches. We stretched together and it felt great, especially when we went and found a window so we could do it in the sunlight. I remember how much she loved that warmth and it makes it hurt a bit less.

Set Boundaries
When your cat wants space, she makes it clear. She teaches us the importance of setting boundaries for our mental well-being. Ding was the boss bitch, but really it was Myra I think of when I think about setting boundaries. Theres a reason we affectionately called her bitchface, man woman dog or cat if you crossed a boundary she’d let you know. She had her ways and lived by her own rules. Slept on my head lol she claimed me as hers in a thousand ways.

Find Comfort in Routine
Cats thrive on routine, whether it’s mealtime or cuddle time. This consistency helps them feel secure, reminding us to create routines that ground us. I’ll be honest, this is initially inspired by Monkey but we’ve found the cats need routine as well. When Ding was sick hubby and monkey went on a trip leaving me with three sick cats, two of whom were on meds, and one of them needed meds 3 times a day. And his food needed to be blended, the process was a good half hour time suck. They’ve gotten better and yo-yo’d and now our middle two guys need to be begged and pleaded with to eat.

Explore with Curiosity
Cats are naturally curious creatures, exploring every nook and cranny of their environment. They inspire us to approach life with curiosity and wonder. Ding was an explorer of all things three feet and lower LOL. I swear I never dropped her but she had a deep rooted fear of falling so did not enjoy being picked up or held, even by me. Whats funny is we also had Simon, who was an explorer of everything higher because he wouldnt touch the floor (for real, we carried him to the litterbox otherwise he basically lived on my desk and we fed him there too), he’d do all manner of twists and curls to not have to touch the floor, I used to say he was my floor is lava kitty. Also was funny to think I dont know if either of them knew the other existed lol. Which is also a reminder that people see the same thing sometimes differently, we only look at things through our own unique lens tinted by past experience and expectations

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
Cats seem unbothered by minor inconveniences; they roll with the punches and move on quickly. They remind us not to get hung up on trivial matters. Ding didnt let the little stuff get to her, even as it got increasingly difficult for her to get around, she’d still frequently leave my room to yell at one of the boys or sometimes to yell at hubby, or to find me when she forgot that I left the room lol but me and her bed and her brush were all she needed to be a happy kitty.

Show Affection Freely
When cats want love, they seek it out without hesitation. They teach us the value of expressing affection and connecting with those we care about. Ding hated every animal and most humans, but for some reason she liked me and I am tremendously grateful and I will miss her yelling until I breathe my last breath, but I can tell you, without a doubt I know that cat loved me, because she showed her affection by her over protectiveness and how she’d seek me out, I took that for what it was, an I love you in Ding language.
Our big guy does head bops. Every day thats how he says I love you, he’ll touch foreheads if cats have those. He’ll stare at you until you put your head close enough for him to bop it.
The new guy? He snuggles, guys he burrows in my hair lol but it feel like his version of kisses.
Dorian shows his belly, thats his I trust you enough to sleep soundly while you pet me and if I’m out enough you’ll get a Blep. Its the cutest.
Isaac does the cuddle and slow blink, plus if he really likes you he’ll pet your face affectionately. Its the cutest.

They are all the cutest, we don’t deserve them, but I am grateful for every minute with mine and every single lesson they taught me. So go forth friends, hug your fur babies and enjoy the unconditional love and blind trust that they entrust you as their human with. Til next time gang, take care of yourselves, and each other.

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10 Half-Assed Mindfulness Hacks for Parents Who Are Losing Their Shit

Listen up, you beautiful disasters! If you’re like me—juggling ADHD, bipolar disorder, fibromyagia, and a kid on the autism spectrum—you probably feel like you’re one meltdown away from joining the circus. Well, grab a seat and a drink (coffee, wine, whatever floats your boat), because I’m about to drop some truth bombs about mindfulness for parents who don’t have time to om their way to nirvana. As if life isnt stressful enough we have elections and questionable economics time. Seriously guys if I think about it too long I cry. So, the answers? I don’t have any, but we’re in it together, so lets get more mindful and attentive and lets be present.

  1. The “Oh Shit” Breath
    When life’s going to hell in a handbasket, take five seconds to breathe like you mean it. It’s not meditation, it’s survival.

  2. Actually Listen to Your Kid (Revolutionary, I Know)
    Put down your phone and pretend your kid’s the most interesting person in the world. Bonus: You might actually learn something.

  3. Body Scan for the Chronically Pained
    From your toes to your “I need coffee” headache, check in with your body. It’s like playing “Where’s Waldo?” but with pain.

  4. One Damn Thing at a Time
    ADHD brain wants to do all the things? Tough shit. Pick one task and stick to it like your sanity depends on it (because it does).

  5. Mindful Eating (Or Inhaling, Let’s Be Real)
    Take a hot second to actually taste that cold pizza you’re scarfing down between crises. Your taste buds will thank you.
  6. Savor the Silence (All 3 Seconds of It)
    Find a quiet moment and cling to it like it’s the last lifeboat on the Titanic. Even if it’s just hiding in the bathroom.
  7. Gratitude: Not Just for Hippies
    When your brain’s being a jerk, list three things you’re grateful for. Even if it’s “I’m grateful I haven’t lost my mind… yet.”
  8. Transition Without Tantrums (You, Not the Kids)
    Take a breath before switching gears. It’s like hitting the mental reset button, but without the IT guy.
  9. Self-Compassion for the Self-Loathing
    On days when you feel like the world’s worst parent, remind yourself: “I haven’t sold the kids to the circus yet, so I’m winning.”
  10. Mindful Moments for the Time-Strapped
    Use those in-between moments to check in with yourself. Waiting in line? Perfect time for a mental health check instead of doom-scrolling.

Look, I know mindfulness sounds like something for people who have their shit together. But trust me, it’s for us mess-makers too. These aren’t fancy techniques; they’re survival skills for parents on the brink. So the next time you’re about to lose it, try one of these. And remember, we’re all in this chaotic, beautiful clusterfuck together. Now go forth and half-ass your way to mindfulness, you amazing people and take care of yourselves, and each other

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More Brain Battles

Folks tonight, in the ‘if I don’t laugh I’ll cry category, welcome to ‘My brain is a sieve and I can’t remember shit’. I know you guys get it, it happens to all of us as we get older, but man you add fibro fog, mania, and ADHD and you’ve got a special kind of mush don’t you? Welcome to the club, where we’re all annoying as hell, but no one’s more pissed off about it than we are!

Let’s start with the classic “I Know Things But Can’t Remember Them When I Need To” syndrome. You know, that delightful phenomenon where your brain is like a squirrel hoarding nuts, except instead of nuts it’s random facts, and instead of finding them when winter comes, they’re lost in the abyss of your mind. It’s like having a library where all the books are constantly rearranging themselves. Fun times! Or how about when you sit straight up in bed some random Thursday at 1:25 in the morning and suddenly someone let the tap that keeps the fun facts all neat and tidy loose and you remember your 4th grade best friend’s dog’s name. Not at all needed or wanted info, but you’ve got that shit at the ready should it ever prove useful.

Then there’s the “I Just Met You And I’ve Already Forgotten Your Name” dance. Oh, the joys of introducing yourself to someone, having a whole conversation, and then realizing you have no clue who the hell they are five minutes later. It’s like your brain has a “delete recent history” button that gets hit every time you meet someone new. Sorry, not sorry, Karen… or was it Susan? Is it awkward to ask the name of someone? How about mid convo? How about for the fourth time? How about when you are so focused on remembering their name that you don’t listen to anything they said because you were too busy committing the name to memory? See? Annoying, well aware, but any way you look at it its going to be awkward so you just gotta pick your awkward lol.

This segues perfectly into our next category “Words Go In But Understanding Takes A Vacation” experience. You know, when someone’s talking to you and you’re nodding along like one of those bobblehead dogs, but your brain is still buffering like a 90s internet connection. By the time you’ve processed what they’ve said, they’re three topics ahead and you’re left wondering if you accidentally time-traveled.

Now, I don’t know the fancy scientific terms for these delightful quirks of cognition. Maybe it’s some flavor of ADHD, a dash of anxiety, or just good old-fashioned “my brain likes to fuck with me” syndrome. Whatever it is, it’s about as welcome as a porcupine in a balloon factory.

The real kicker? We know we’re annoying people. We see the eye rolls, the sighs, the “I just told you this five minutes ago” looks. But trust me, no one is more annoyed than we are. It’s like being trapped in a sitcom where you’re both the bumbling character AND the frustrated audience.

So, to all my fellow memory-challenged, slow-processing, name-forgetting comrades out there, I salute you. We may be annoying as hell, but at least we’re consistent about it. And hey, if people get too fed up with us, chances are we’ll forget about it anyway!

Remember (ha!), you’re not alone in this cognitive clusterfuck. We’re all just doing our best to navigate a world that expects us to remember things, process information quickly, and not look like a deer in headlights during casual conversation. So cut yourself some slack, embrace the chaos, and maybe invest in some name tags.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go figure out who the hell I was talking to earlier and why I have a reminder on my phone that just says “purple elephant banana split.” Notes only work if they make sense people lol. Wish me luck! Til next time, take care of yourself, and each other!

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Some quick housekeeping notes…

Hi again!
So since the audience might be different than the group I had years ago I wanted to clarify and make sure we’re all on the same page. I’m going to try and not be as word-y so I apologize in advance and please let me know if I am unclear in any of this.

1. The name. WannaBeNormal. When I started years ago, I used to think that was the dream, to be a NORMAL girl with NORMAL dreams and NORMAL pursuits and relationships. I figured out pretty soon into my journey there really is no such thing as NORMAL. We all process things differently, our body chemistry while similar is not the same, and normal static average is just not a thing, we’re all on a sliding scale, and how boring would life be if we were all exactly the same? We don’t all want the same things either, some things are more important to certain people than others and we need all types of diversity to advance in society such as it is. At that point I thought about coming out with DONTWannaBeNormal, but I don’t really think that either. I just want to be the best version of me I can possibly be and help others to do the same. So if I were to name the site now it would probably be WannaBeBetter, but not in a sense, just a better me than I am, and I’m working on it.

2. I’ve always been upfront since I can be anonymous with you all about my mental health. While my bipolar is not wild and extreme, its still up and down. I was on meds that took away the highs and lows, but I felt like I felt NOTHING, and thats no way to live either. I’ve finally felt a bit more mediums the last few years and the waves are less frequent but no less severe. When I’m low, I can’t see the surface let alone find a way out, when I’m manic, its hands and knees scrubbing the kitchen floor at 8 in the morning. I’d love this mixed episode right now if I didn’t have such a broken body.

3. I’ve had to go off meds for various reasons, some because of how they interacted with the new heart meds I’ve needed, I had to go off pain meds because that was just no way to live and they were contributing to the death of my kidneys. My anti-anxiety had to go because the level of sedation over such a prolonged amount of time was having lasting effects. Not all meds are bad, and I still take plenty, I just started exploring other options because with each added med you get not just the meds interaction with your body chemistry you also add the drug interactions possibility. I had been actively taking something that caused something else, which I then needed meds to counteract! And no one caught it or even thought to tell me it was a possibility. STAY INFORMED AND ASK QUESTIONS! I’ve been using some more natural remedies with mostly positive reactions. Its still all about moderation and tempering and tailoring a method that works for you. While I won’t tell you how to do it, because as I said, my way simply won’t work for others who were not designed like me, I will help you figure out what works best for you. I WANT to help you figure out what works for you and find out a practical way to implement it and maintain it. I can do it in a general sense on my blog and in my videos but if you contact me directly I will help you with your specific goals. Not only would it help you, but helping people makes ME feel better too, so you’re like, almost being rude by not telling me. *pouty face that I am entirely too old to employ*, I won’t stop trying to please the masses but we all know thats impossible so helping a select few would be awesome.

4. There’s so much more I’d love to clear up for people but I have to get it in bite size pieces as do many of you as well I’m sure, too much info at once and it feels like pouring too much water in a glass. Getting too much info makes me not just not get the stuff that you try and tell me after my thoughts have veered off the road, but also the whole beginning will fly out the window just because it knows how to piss me off. My subconscious is a dick guys!