A Completely Serious List of My Current Coping Skills

January 15, 2026 JoLeave a comment

In the spirit of honesty, growth, and not pretending I have my life together, here is a completely serious and medically unreviewed list of my current coping skills.

Avoiding Mirrors
Not because of vanity. Because mirrors ask questions I’m not prepared to answer. Like ‘Girl why are you going anywhere dressed like that?’
Snacks as Emotional Infrastructure
Are they nutritional? Sometimes. Sometimes I’d be better off nutrient wise eating the damn box
Are they morale? Absolutely. Until you spot the mirror and it says ‘maybe the cookies are a bit much’
Pretending It’s Fine (Short-Term Use Only)
Works best in public settings, family functions, and when someone says, “So how have you been?”
I get bored answering that so I state how I’d like to have been. Mirroring other people gets redundant too.
Start making up stories or stop talking to people or be boring and say fine are your only options.
Talking to Pets Like They’re Union Reps
They understand. They always understand. You know who you don’t have to pretend to be fine to? A dog. Dogs can get you through shit. I’d like to say the same for cats but a lot of them would be judging you. Its part of their job description.
Strategic Dissociation (Light Version)
Not the scary kind.
Just enough to get through Target without crying in seasonal décor. Besides it helps the chores go faster when you lose hours at a time.
Writing Things Down So My Brain Can Stop Holding Them Hostage
Once it’s on paper, my mind is like, “Cool, not my problem anymore.” The problem is remembering to write the note and where you put it, because you set it down somewhere didnt you? Writing stuff down helps but if you cant remember where you put it tends to pile onto the existing issues. More baggage, yay
Canceling Plans Early So I Don’t Feel Like a Villain Later
This is called foresight. And self-respect. And exhaustion. Better plan, don’t make concrete plans, then you can’t flake out of them. Now THAT’S foresight.
Rewatching Shows I’ve Already Seen
No surprises. No emotional ambushes. Just vibes. That is the great thing about having a shitty memory, its basically brand new shit.
Lowering the Bar and Then Respecting It
Today’s goal is not productivity.
Today’s goal is “nothing got worse.” Today I met my goal of not fucking more stuff up. Some does that is deserving of a medal.
Letting Things Be Weird Instead of Trying to Fix Them Immediately
Some days aren’t broken.
They’re just… a lot. I get lost in the Overwhelm.

These aren’t glamorous coping skills.
They won’t make it into a self-help book.
But they’re keeping the lights on, and honestly? That counts.

If you’re doing what you can with what you have, you’re not failing.
You’re coping. And sometimes that’s the win.

Til next time gang, take care of yourselves, and each other.

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The Quiet Depression No One Warns You About After the Holidays

January 1, 2026January 1, 2026 JoLeave a comment

The holidays end, and everyone else seems to bounce back into life like it was all just a brief inconvenience. Decorations come down. Resolutions go up. People start talking about productivity and “fresh starts.”

There’s a strange sadness that settles in after the holidays — not dramatic, not loud, just heavy. The excitement is gone, the lights are packed away, and spring feels like a rumor someone made up to be polite.

Meanwhile, I’m standing in my kitchen staring out the window at gray trees, wondering how many months it is until I can touch dirt again. The holidays were made for family so when you are missing part of your family, you begin to question ever feeling anything other than this ever. Some days the hardest part isn’t missing them — it’s wondering if the version of me who was their mom actually existed.

This stretch of time — from after the holidays until the world thaws out — hits a lot of people harder than we admit. Shorter days mean less sunlight, which affects serotonin and melatonin levels in the brain. That shift alone can mess with mood, energy, and sleep. It’s one of the reasons Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) tends to peak in late winter, not December when everyone expects it.

But even without a formal diagnosis, this season can still feel emotionally brutal.

It’s the letdown after months of buildup.
The loss of structure.
The quiet after forced togetherness.
The waiting.

Everyone talks about January as a reset, but for some of us it’s more like limbo. Not moving forward. Not moving back. Just stuck — watching other people carry on while we tread emotional water.

I’m not drifting, I’m not drowning — I’m stuck treading water, burning energy just to stay here.

What makes this season especially isolating is that it doesn’t look like depression the way people expect. You’re still functioning. Still showing up. Still doing what needs to be done. You just feel… dulled. Unmotivated. Sad without a clean reason.

And because nothing is technically wrong, it’s easy to tell yourself you should be fine.

But this isn’t a personal failure. It’s a seasonal one.

Human beings aren’t designed to thrive in months of darkness, cold, and waiting. We’re meant to move, to grow things, to be outside doing something that feels alive. When that gets taken away, it leaves a very real emotional gap.

So if you’re struggling right now, you’re not weak.
You’re not ungrateful.
You’re not broken.

You’re just in the long, quiet middle — the part no one puts on a calendar.

And sometimes the only goal isn’t happiness. It’s getting through this season gently enough to meet yourself again when the light comes back. This is the year I stop treading water, I will start swimming again. Til next time gang, take care of yourselves, and each other