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Things My Brain Treats Like Optional DLC

Living with Chronic Illness is basically like living with a brain that’s trying its best… but also doing parkour off the furniture. Some days I’m thriving, some days I’m forgetting what I’m doing mid-sentence, and honestly? Most days I’m just negotiating with my own executive function like it’s a hostile coworker. So here’s a little peek behind the curtain: the things my brain treats like optional DLC.

1. Object permanence… most of the time.
If I put it down and walk away, it may as well have been launched into another dimension. Keys, water bottles, important documents — all living their best lives in the ADHD void. Tell me its important, its the surefire way to get me to lose it.

2. Starting tasks? Easy. Finishing them? Bold of you to assume.
I will begin a project with Olympic enthusiasm and then abandon it halfway like a Victorian ghost girl drifting out of a scene. Don’t believe me? My craft desk is currently auditioning for a documentary called ‘When Hobbies Attack.’ Pearls would be clutched. Fainting couches would be used.

3. Time? A concept. A myth. A prank.
Ten minutes feels like an hour, an hour feels like twelve seconds, and deadlines feel like cosmic jokes written specifically for me. I need to get up, says my brain, the laundry should be done. Sure, its done, as is the day, the entire day slipped through my grasp like time itself saw me trying and said, ‘Aw, cute,’ before sprinting off.

4. Noise? Too much. Silence? Also too much.
I am either overstimulated by the faint hum of the fridge or suddenly panicking because the quiet feels suspicious. There is no chill setting. I generally leave the tv on and use the mute button, sometimes I even remember to unmute or unpause (go me)

5. Hyperfocus that appears only for hobbies, never chores.
Ask me to reorganize a shelf for fun? Instant productivity demon. Ask me to fold laundry? My brain blue screens. Meanwhile the laundry is over there quietly becoming part of the home’s structural integrity.

6. Forgetting why I opened a new tab mid-click.
My fingers click “new tab” with confidence. My brain immediately abandons the mission. We will never know what the goal was. This is the thing I hate the most. Yesterday I was at hubby’s desk and he was saying something and I said ‘I’ll go look that up’ and I turned and FELT myself forgetting it, I hadnt made it to the door when I had to turn back around and apologized and asked him to repeat himself.

7. Needing a reward just to take a shower like it’s a game quest.
“+10 XP for personal hygiene. New achievement unlocked: You Finally Did It.”
Honestly, adulting would be easier if life came with a loot box. Honestly, the only thing getting me in that shower is the promise of pajamas immediately after. The shower helps most days its just the act of doing all the things is exhausting.

8. “I’ll do it in a minute” — famous last words.
Because that “minute” might be five hours later… or three to five business days, depending on vibes and moon phases. And if a kid interrupts me? Congratulations, that task has now been postponed indefinitely.

Sure, my brain is a gremlin on roller skates, but honestly? I’m still waking up and doing my best every day. Til next time gang, take care of yourselves, and each other.

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7 Conversations I’ve Had With Myself This Week

Look, I talk to myself. A lot. And not in the cute “oh, I’m just thinking out loud” way that neurotypical people do. I’m talking full-blown conversations, complete with tone changes, arguments, and occasionally losing said arguments to myself. If you have ADHD, chronic illness, or just a generally chaotic brain, you know exactly what I’m talking about.

Here are seven actual conversations I’ve had with myself this week. I’m not proud of most of them, but I’m also not surprised by any of them.

1. The Medication Negotiation

Me at 8 AM: “Okay, time to take your pills.”

Also me: “But do I really NEED them today? I feel fine.”

Me: “You feel fine BECAUSE of the pills, you absolute potato.”

Also me: “But what if I’ve been healed by positive thinking and I don’t need them anymore?”

Me: “We’ve been through this. Take the damn pills.”

Also me: “Fine, but I’m not happy about it.”

[Takes pills]

Me, two hours later when brain fog hits: “Why didn’t I take my pills on time?”

Also me: “…We literally just had this conversation.”

2. The Food Decision Paralysis

Me, standing in kitchen: “I should eat something.”

Also me: “Agreed. What do we want?”

Me: “I don’t know, what sounds good?”

Also me: “Nothing sounds good.”

Me: “Okay, what do we HAVE?”

Also me: “Everything and nothing.”

Me: “That’s not helpful.”

Also me: “Neither is staring into the fridge like it’s going to solve our problems.”

Me: “What if we just eat cereal again?”

Also me: “We had cereal for dinner last night.”

Me: “Your point?”

[Grabs bowl]

3. The Task Initiation Battle

Me: “I need to start that thing.”

Also me: “Which thing?”

Me: “You know, THE thing. The important thing.”

Also me: “Oh right. When are we doing that?”

Me: “Now. We’re doing it now.”

Also me: “But first, let me just check my phone real quick.”

Me: “NO. We’re not doing this.”

Also me: “Just one quick scroll.”

Me: “It’s never one quick scroll and you know it.”

Also me: “But what if someone texted us?”

Me: “They didn’t.”

Also me: “But what if they did and it’s urgent?”

Me: “FINE. Five minutes.”

[Three hours later]

Me: “We never started the thing, did we?”

Also me: “…In our defense, we learned a lot about seahorse reproduction.”

4. The Sleep Schedule Delusion

Me at 9 PM: “We should go to bed.”

Also me: “But I’m not tired.”

Me: “We’re never tired at bedtime. That’s literally our thing.”

Also me: “What if tonight is different?”

Me: “It’s not. Go to bed.”

Also me: “But what if I just scroll for a bit and THEN go to bed?”

Me: “That has literally never worked.”

Also me: “There’s a first time for everything.”

[At 2 AM]

Me: “I hate us.”

Also me: “Same.”

5. The Executive Function Check-In

Me: “Have we showered today?”

Also me: “…Define ‘today.'”

Me: “The current 24-hour period.”

Also me: “Then no.”

Me: “What about yesterday?”

Also me: “I plead the fifth.”

Me: “We need to shower.”

Also me: “That sounds like a lot of steps.”

Me: “It’s literally just standing in water.”

Also me: “Yeah, but first we have to DECIDE to shower, then remember to shower, then actually GET IN the shower, then remember what order the shower things go in…”

Me: “Okay I see your point.”

Also me: “Plus we’d have to find a clean towel.”

Me: “Never mind. We’ll shower tomorrow.”

Also me: “Bold of you to assume tomorrow will be any different.”

6. The Pain Scale Debate

Me: “Ow.”

Also me: “What’s the pain level?”

Me: “I don’t know, like a 6?”

Also me: “Is it though? Remember that time we thought 7 was bad and then we had that 9?”

Me: “Good point. Maybe it’s a 5.”

Also me: “But if it’s a 5, should we take pain meds?”

Me: “I don’t know, what if it gets worse and we already used up our meds?”

Also me: “But what if we DON’T take meds and it gets worse anyway?”

Me: “What if we just suffer through it and prove we’re tough?”

Also me: “That sounds like internalized ableism.”

Me: “You’re right. Okay, taking meds.”

Also me: “Wait, did we already take meds today?”

Me: “…I don’t remember.”

Also me: “Cool, cool. This is fine. Everything is fine.”

7. The Bedtime Existential Crisis

Me at 1 AM: “Why are we like this?”

Also me: “Like what?”

Me: “You know… LIKE THIS. The chaos. The forgetting. The talking to ourselves at 1 AM.”

Also me: “It’s not our fault our brain is wired differently.”

Me: “I know, but sometimes I wish we were just… normal.”

Also me: “Normal people are boring.”

Me: “Normal people remember to pay bills on time.”

Also me: “Okay, fair point.”

Me: “Normal people don’t have to negotiate with themselves about basic tasks.”

Also me: “But would we really want to be normal if it meant losing our creativity? Our hyperfocus superpowers? Our ability to make connections nobody else sees?”

Me: “…Are you just trying to make us feel better?”

Also me: “Is it working?”

Me: “A little.”

Also me: “Then yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing.”

Me: “We should probably go to sleep.”

Also me: “Agreed. Right after we Google one quick thing.”

Me: “We both know that’s a lie.”

Also me: “And yet here we are.”


The Conclusion I Didn’t Ask For

The truth is, talking to myself has become such a normal part of my life that I forget other people don’t do this. Or at least, they don’t do it out loud. Or with multiple distinct personalities arguing about whether cereal counts as dinner.

But here’s the thing: these internal (and sometimes external) conversations are how my brain processes things. It’s how I work through decisions, remember tasks, and occasionally talk myself into doing basic human functions like showering and eating vegetables.

Is it weird? Absolutely. Is it exhausting? You have no idea. Would I change it if I could?

Ask me again after I’ve had some sleep. And by sleep, I mean after I finish this one last Google search about whether other people have full conversations with themselves or if I should be concerned. Til next time gang, take care of yourself, and each other.

[Spoiler alert: I Googled it. It’s apparently normal. We’re fine. Probably.]

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Reasons I Walked Into This Room (Spoiler: I Still Don’t Know)

An ADHD mystery in real time

Here I am, standing in my bedroom, looking around like I’ve never seen this place before in my life. I definitely had a purpose when I left the kitchen. I was very determined. I had INTENT.

Now? I got nothing.

What I Tell Myself It Might Have Been:

  1. To get my phone charger
    (Nope my phone is at 97%)
  2. To grab that important document I need
    (what document? for what? the mystery deepens)
  3. To put away that thing I left in here yesterday
    (what thing? which yesterday? time is a construct)
  4. To check if I left my coffee cup in here
    (I’m not even drinking coffee today)
  5. To get something for my kid who asked for… something
    (they’re at school. it’s Tuesday. I think.)
  6. To turn off a light that was bothering me
    (all the lights are off. it’s 2 PM. I’m questioning reality)
  7. To find my glasses
    (they’re on my head. they’ve been on my head this entire time)
  8. To get that book I was reading
    (I haven’t touched a book in three weeks, what am I even talking about)
  9. To look for my keys so I don’t lose them later
    (they’re in my pocket. jingling. mocking me)

The Actual Reason:

I followed the cat.

The cat had no destination either.

We’re both just standing here now, equally confused, staring at each other and wondering what we’re doing with our lives. At least the cat has an excuse – he’s a cat. His life goals include knocking things off counters, judging my life choices, and staring at invisible things on the wall.

I’m a grown adult who apparently takes navigation cues from a creature whose biggest daily decision is which sunny spot to nap in.

Current Status:

Still in the room. Still don’t know why. The cat has moved on to more important cat business (aggressive grooming of one specific paw). I’m considering asking him for directions back to whatever I was originally doing, but he’s giving me that look that says, “Figure it out yourself, human. I’m not your GPS.”

Maybe I’ll just stay here forever. Set up camp. Make this room my new home base. At least then when people ask “Why are you in here?” I can say “I live here now. This is my life. The cat is my roommate. We don’t ask questions.”

Anyone else take mystery tours of their own house, or is it just me and my feline guide to nowhere?

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The Great Medication Shuffle: Morning Pills, Evening Pills, and the Ones I Forgot Existed

Or: How My Medicine Cabinet Became a Small Pharmacy and I Still Can’t Remember What I’m Supposed to Take When

Looking at my bathroom counter right now, I count fourteen different pill bottles, three liquid medications, two inhalers, and a partridge in a pear tree. Okay, maybe not the partridge, but at this point I wouldn’t be surprised if my doctor prescribed one for “mood support.”

For those of you managing multiple chronic conditions, you know the drill. What started as “just take this once a day” has evolved into a complex choreographed dance that would make Broadway jealous. And like any good performance, timing is everything—except I have ADHD and the memory of a goldfish with anxiety.

Meet the Cast of Characters

The Morning Crew: These are the heavy hitters that transform me from zombie to semi-functional human. They’re the ones that make it possible for me to remember my own name and possibly locate the coffee maker.

I have to take 16 pills in the morning, and it’s as gross and exhausting as it sounds. While I’m supposed to take all that in the morning, I split it up to make it easier to manage, so my pills are morning, later morning, dinner/bed. Frequently when I sit down to do my meds I have missed a few from the “later morning” category. Because nothing says “good morning” like swallowing what feels like a handful of gravel.

The Evening Squad: The night shift workers whose job is to help me actually sleep instead of lying awake cataloging every embarrassing thing I’ve done since 1987.

At night I feel like I do a lot of prep work. I take 5 at dinner. One of those is half a dose of sleep/anti-anxiety. I take another 3 when I sit down for the night. Once I have done my chores I pop the other half and soon am out cold. If any one of those is off by an inch I won’t sleep or will pass out mid-chore. It’s like a tightrope balance really, but I fall far more often lol. Nothing quite like waking up on the couch with a half-folded load of laundry as your blanket.

The Wildcards: These are the divas of the medication world. Take with food. Don’t take with food. Take two hours before this other medication but not within four hours of dairy products. Take while standing on your head during a full moon. (Okay, I made that last one up, but honestly, would you be surprised?)

I take one that’s ‘take with 600 calories.’ Ok, as in, how close to eating? Before? After? What will happen if I’m not a nutritionist and therefore have NO IDEA how many calories will be enough? Do I need to whip out a food scale? Should I be doing math at breakfast? Is a bagel with cream cheese 600 calories or am I supposed to add a side of existential dread?

The Forgotten: Every medicine cabinet has them—the bottles in the back that you rediscover like archaeological artifacts. “Oh hey, I was supposed to be taking this for anxiety… six months ago. That explains a lot.”

I have a tough time with my late morning meds, so they often get forgotten until later in the day, then it’s the ‘would it be better to double up/take them closer to the night time ones? When do we no longer consider it because it’s too close to the others?’ Such fickle little things they are. It’s like playing medication Jenga—one wrong move and the whole system comes tumbling down.

The Systems I’ve Tried (And How They’ve Failed Me)

The Pill Organizer Approach: Seemed foolproof, right? Wrong. First, I had to figure out which size. The tiny ones where I can barely fit my horse-sized vitamins? The weekly ones that don’t account for my twice-daily medications? The monthly system that takes up half my kitchen counter?

I started out resisting these HARD, then went to the daily ones. They didn’t work—I’d forget to fill it, so one day at a time, I was not responsible enough for that. I lived, I learned, I got a weekly with the days broke into 4 sections, and it works. And if I forget, I always skip just because that’s easier to fix than the opposite way—it’s better to err on the side of caution. Nothing like turning medication management into a weekly game of Tetris.

The Phone Alarm Method: Set seventeen different alarms with helpful names like “ADHD Med” and “Don’t Forget Thyroid Pill.” Works great until you’re in an important meeting and your phone starts screaming “TAKE YOUR CRAZY PILLS NOW” at full volume.

Or, like me, you manage to dismiss them all subconsciously or your brain chooses to ignore them lol. It’s like my ADHD brain has developed selective hearing specifically for the alarms that are supposed to help me function. I can hear a bag of chips opening from three rooms away, but medication reminders? Nope, not registering.

The Medication Apps: Downloaded four different apps that promised to change my life. They all judged me harder than my mother when I inevitably forgot to log my doses. Nothing like a guilt trip from your phone to start the day.

The apps that would change my life all involved either purchases through the app, or require so much of my time I spent more energy journaling and entering the same responses than actually taking the medications. Or I’d not remember to enter them at all after week two. Apparently, I need an app to remind me to use the app that reminds me to take my medication. It’s apps all the way down.

The “I’ll Just Remember” Method: The most delusional approach of all. My ADHD brain that can’t remember where I put my keys five minutes ago was somehow going to remember a complex medication schedule. Spoiler alert: it didn’t work.

I will have my bottle in my hand wondering if I JUST took one, or if my brain is showing me past me taking them as I’d done countless times before. It’s like my brain is running a highlight reel of every time I’ve ever taken that medication, making it impossible to distinguish between “five minutes ago” and “Tuesday three weeks ago.”

The Real Struggles Nobody Talks About

The “Did I or Didn’t I?” Game: Standing in your bathroom at 2 PM, staring at a pill bottle, trying to remember if you took your morning medication or just thought really hard about taking it. It’s like the worst guessing game ever, with side effects as consequences.

So I stand there, debating my next move like it’s a choose-your-own-adventure novel: Option A: Take the pills and risk double-dosing myself into a nap I didn’t plan. Option B: Skip them and spend the rest of the day vibrating at the wrong frequency. Spoiler alert: I picked Option C — called my teen into the room and asked, “Hey, did you see me take these earlier?” They just stared at me like, “You realize I don’t follow your every move, right?” Thanks, kid. Very helpful.

The Pharmacy Mystery Calls: “Hi, your prescription for [medication you’ve never heard of] is ready for pickup!” Wait, what? When did I get prescribed that? Have I been supposed to be taking something this whole time?

Frequently I will go in for my appointment and bloodwork and she’ll call something in but forget to send the email until I contact them. So I’m left wondering if this mystery medication is something crucial I’ve been missing, or if it’s the pharmaceutical equivalent of a pocket dial. Either way, I’m driving to the pharmacy feeling like I’m solving a medical mystery.

The Coordination Nightmare: Doctor A wants to change medication X, but you have to check with Doctor B because it interacts with medication Y, and Doctor C doesn’t know about either of them because the medical records system is apparently held together with duct tape and prayers.

I once spent three weeks playing telephone between my psychiatrist, primary care doctor, and endocrinologist because nobody could agree on whether my new thyroid medication would interfere with my ADHD meds. Meanwhile, I’m sitting in the middle like a very tired, very caffeinated UN mediator, taking notes and trying to remember who said what about which pill. Spoiler alert: they all had different opinions, and I ended up being my own case study.

The Instruction Manual: That one medication that comes with a novel’s worth of instructions. Take with food, but not dairy. Don’t lie down for 30 minutes after taking. Avoid sunlight. May cause drowsiness or insomnia (thanks for being specific).

My personal favorite is the medication that says “may cause dizziness” and “do not operate heavy machinery,” but then also warns “may cause restlessness and inability to sit still.” So… I can’t drive, but I also can’t stop moving? Should I just pace around my house indefinitely? And don’t get me started on “take on an empty stomach” versus “take with food to avoid nausea.” Pick a lane, pharmaceutical industry!

What Actually Works (Sort Of)

After years of trial and error (emphasis on error), I’ve cobbled together a system that works approximately 73% of the time, which in my world counts as a rousing success.

My current system is that weekly pill organizer with four compartments per day, plus a backup system of keeping the bottles nearby for those “did I or didn’t I” moments and I actually write an x. I’ve learned to embrace the “when in doubt, skip it” philosophy because it’s easier to catch up on a missed dose than to undo a double dose. And yes, I still sometimes ask my family members if they’ve seen me take my pills, because apparently it takes a village to medicate one ADHD brain.

The key insight I’ve learned is this: there is no perfect system. There’s only the system that fails less catastrophically than the others. Some days I nail the medication schedule like a responsible adult. Other days I take my evening pills at 2 PM and wonder why I’m sleepy.

Just last week, I confidently took my morning pills, felt very proud of myself, and then found the same pills sitting in my pill organizer an hour later. Turns out I had taken yesterday’s forgotten dose. Mystery solved, but also… how did I not notice I was taking pills from the wrong day? ADHD brain strikes again.

The Bottom Line

If you’re struggling with medication management, know that you’re not alone in this pharmaceutical juggling act. We’re all just doing our best with brains that sometimes work against us and bodies that require more maintenance than a vintage car.

Your worth isn’t measured by how perfectly you follow your medication schedule. It’s measured by the fact that you keep trying, keep adapting, and keep finding ways to take care of yourself even when it feels impossibly complicated. Some days “good enough” really is good enough, and that’s perfectly okay.

Managing multiple chronic conditions isn’t just about remembering to take pills—it’s about being patient with yourself when your brain doesn’t cooperate, forgiving yourself when systems fail, and celebrating the small victories like remembering your evening meds before midnight.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go stare at my pill bottles and try to remember if 2 PM counts as “evening” for my twice-daily medication.

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ADHD and the Never-Ending Quest for the Right System

Or: How I Own More Planners Than Pairs of Jeans, and Still Can’t Find That Dentist Appointment Card

We’ve all been there. You buy the pretty planner with the gold coil, convinced that this will be the one to change your life. Then you try the bullet journal method because minimalism is supposed to cure chaos. Then you download six productivity apps, each promising to be the magic solution to your scattered existence. For one glorious week, you are an organizational deity, color-coding tasks (I have bought colored pens and every pen has the same color notebook and folder and yeah I am a giant nerd lol) and checking boxes like a productivity influencer. Then — poof — the planner’s under the couch collecting dust, the apps are unopened with little red notification badges mocking you, and you’re frantically scribbling your grocery list on the back of a Target receipt while standing in the cereal aisle.

Sound familiar? Welcome to the ADHD productivity paradox: we desperately need systems to function, but we’re spectacularly bad at sticking to them.

Why This Happens (Yes, Science Says So)

ADHD brains are novelty seekers. According to research published in Brain journal by Sethi et al. (2018), our dopamine reward system runs differently than neurotypical brains, with studies showing that people with ADHD have dysfunction in the dopamine reward pathway (Volkow et al., 2010). This means we thrive on new and interesting stimuli — like that gorgeous new planner layout with the perfect font — but struggle to maintain interest once the novelty wears off. That dopamine hit from “new system day” is real, but it’s also temporary.

Executive function is a fickle beast. Studies consistently show that people with ADHD have weaker function and structure of prefrontal cortex (PFC) circuits, the brain regions responsible for planning, prioritizing, and task-switching (Arnsten, 2009). Neuroimaging research has found reduced activity in certain parts of the PFC during tasks requiring sustained attention and complex decision-making (AGCO Health, 2024). It’s not laziness or lack of willpower — it’s literally how our brains are wired.. Thats why I cycle through hobbies so fast and its something I’m actively working on.

One size does not fit all. Most productivity systems are designed by and for neurotypical brains that can handle routine, sequential thinking, and sustained attention. Trying to wedge ourselves into these systems is like trying to wear jeans two sizes too small — you can do it, but it’s uncomfortable, restrictive, and not pretty.

Perfectionism is the enemy of progress. Many of us fall into the trap of thinking that if we can’t do a system “perfectly,” we shouldn’t do it at all. Miss one day of journaling? Throw out the whole journal. Forget to update the app for a week? Delete it in shame. This all-or-nothing thinking sabotages any chance of finding what actually works.

How to Work With Your Brain, Not Against It

1. Think Modular, Not Monumental. Instead of searching for one perfect “forever system,” embrace using multiple small, interchangeable tools that can work independently. Sticky notes for quick reminders that need immediate action, a large wall calendar for big-picture dates and deadlines, your phone’s alarm function for time-sensitive appointments, and maybe a simple notebook for brain dumps when your thoughts are spinning. Mix and match based on what your current life phase demands.

2. Use Dopamine to Your Advantage. Instead of fighting your brain’s need for novelty, make it part of the plan. Intentionally change colors, formats, or methods every few weeks to refresh your interest and re-engage that dopamine reward system. Buy different colored pens seasonally, switch between digital and paper tools, or reorganize your workspace regularly. Make variety a feature, not a bug.

3. Embrace “Good Enough” Productivity. You don’t need to track every habit, meal, mood, water intake, and bowel movement to be a functioning adult. Choose three key areas that truly impact your daily life and focus on keeping just those consistent. Let everything else flex and flow as needed. Progress, not perfection, is the goal.

4. Automate & Delegate Where Possible. Set recurring phone reminders for regular tasks, use grocery delivery or curbside pickup to eliminate list-making stress, automate bill payments, or recruit a family member to be your “appointment buddy” for remembering important dates. Your brain doesn’t have to carry every single piece of information if technology and other people can help.

5. Plan for Disruption. Build buffer days into your schedule, expect that your tools will need periodic rebooting, and never expect sustained perfection. Create “reset rituals” for when systems inevitably break down — maybe Sunday nights for clearing your workspace or the first of each month for reassessing what’s working. The point is to support your life, not win an imaginary “most organized person alive” award.

6. Start Ridiculously Small. Instead of overhauling your entire organizational approach, pick one tiny thing and make it automatic first. Maybe it’s putting your keys in the same spot every day, or writing tomorrow’s most important task on a sticky note before bed. Once that feels natural, add something else small. Baby steps prevent the overwhelm that kills motivation.

The Big Takeaway

You’re not broken because you can’t stick to one pristine system for years on end. Your brain is wired for variety, stimulation, and flexibility — so make those traits part of your organizational plan instead of fighting against them. You’re not failing the system. The system is failing you if it can’t adapt and flex with your very real, very human reality.

The goal isn’t to become neurotypical. It’s to find tools and approaches that work with your unique brain, even if they look messy or unconventional to outside observers. Some days that might mean a color-coded digital calendar. Other days it might mean a crumpled napkin with three things scrawled on it. Both are valid if they help you function.

Your worth isn’t measured by how perfectly you maintain a bullet journal or how consistently you use the latest productivity app. It’s measured by how well you’re living your life, taking care of what matters, and being kind to yourself in the process. Til next time gang, take care of yourselves, and each other!

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When Words Go Whoosh:

The Hilarious Hiccups of Auditory Processing

Hey, fellow brain-glitch aficionados! Ever find yourself nodding along in a conversation, when—BAM!—your brain decides to take an impromptu vacation? Welcome to the wild world of auditory processing mishaps!

What’s Happening Up There?
Picture your brain as a super-slick computer. It normally takes in sound, converts it to signals, and serves up meaning faster than you can say “What?” But sometimes, it’s like trying to untangle last year’s Christmas lights: messy and confusing.

The Science-y Bit (Don’t Worry, It’s Fun)
This little brain hiccup is known as Auditory Processing Disorder (APD). It’s when your brain’s sound system decides to prank you. One minute you’re fine, and the next, you’re wondering if everyone around you started speaking Klingon. This little brain hiccup is known as Auditory Processing Disorder (APD). When you have APD, your brain struggles to process the sounds it hears correctly. It’s like if you were listening to music and the song kept skipping, leaving you wondering what just happened.

The brain processes sound in a specific order: first, the ear detects sound waves, then sends electrical signals to the brain. The auditory cortex takes those signals and decodes them into speech and meaning. Simple, right? But when there’s a glitch in that system, you might hear everything perfectly fine, but your brain just can’t put it together the way it’s supposed to. I know for me, it just takes my brain a little extra time to make the words known to my brain. Like my husband can talk, and I swear to you it sounds like Charlie Brown’s adults ‘wha whaaa wha waa wha’ lol, so I will ask for repeats or clarifications, then as he is talking, I understand what they said a minute ago and I have a comment about it. I have a bad habit of interrupting people, I am trying to stop, but I KNOW if I keep my comment to myself theres a 95% chance I will forget (and if I do I’m sorry and that will make me even MORE mad at my misfiring brain, its a perpetual state of loathing)

Fun Fact: Studies suggest that around 5% of children have some form of APD, and it often goes undiagnosed, leaving kids (and adults) in a perpetual state of “Huh?”

Signs You’re Having an Auditory Adventure:

  • Words suddenly sound like gibberish. (Is this what babies feel like all the time?)
  • You catch yourself saying “Huh?” more than a confused owl.
  • You’re nodding and smiling, hoping no one realizes you’re lost in auditory space.

The Plot Twist: When You’re the One Speaking
Irony strikes! Sometimes, your own words decide to play hide and seek in your brain. It’s like your thoughts are sprinting while your mouth is stuck in quicksand. So embarrassing and happens at least once per conversation

Why Does This Happen?


Fatigue: When you’re running low on energy, your brain can’t work at full capacity. Studies have shown that fatigue can slow down the brain’s ability to process auditory information. It can slow down the brains ability to process any information actually. Essentially, your brain starts skipping steps in its usual routine—like a tired computer processing instructions slower than usual. According to research, lack of sleep (or chronic sleep deprivation) can decrease the brain’s ability to filter out irrelevant sounds, leading to auditory processing issues.


Stress: Ever notice how hard it is to concentrate when you’re stressed? Well, turns out your brain is sort of like a nervous multitasker. When you’re under stress, your brain’s focus shifts to dealing with the stressor (like an impending deadline or an important meeting) and less on the conversation happening around you. Research from the American Psychological Association has found that chronic stress can affect how the brain processes auditory stimuli by overloading the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for attention and processing language.


Sensory Overload: Your brain is constantly bombarded with sensory information—sounds, sights, smells, you name it. When too much sensory input floods in at once, your brain can have a “processing jam.” Think of it like trying to run too many apps at once on your phone. Research has shown that sensory overload, especially in noisy environments, can make it harder for your brain to filter and focus on the important sounds (like someone speaking to you), causing a breakdown in auditory processing. Studies also show that people with APD are more sensitive to background noise, which exacerbates this issue.

Coping Strategies (or “How to Pretend You’re Still on Earth”)

  • The classic “Could you repeat that?” (Works 60% of the time.)
  • Blame it on a sudden case of daydreaming (who doesn’t love a good daydreamer?)
  • Master the art of the vague response: “Wow, that’s really something!” Practice the smile and nod.

Remember, you’re not alone in this auditory obstacle course. So next time your brain takes an unscheduled break, just smile and laugh—it’s too short not to!

Take care, stay quirky, and make sure to be good to each other! Don’t forget to spread the kindness and love, to yourselves and each other! (George is around btw he says hi. I was going to post a picture of George and Georgina they are always playing with their kids in my yard, I’ll get one soon!)