Tag: #NeurodivergentMom

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Survival & Sanity Week 25 & 26

JoLeave a comment

Listen, meal planning is basically the Olympics of adulting. And if you’re running low on spoons, have kids who think chicken nuggets are a food group, or just don’t want to set your house on fire trying to “whip something up” after 5 p.m., you need a plan that’s simple, flexible, and doesn’t judge you for eating tacos three times a week if you want to.

So here it is: two weeks of real-life dinners that use reserves, leftovers, and a little bit of bacon for moral support. You don’t need to spend an hour chopping. You don’t need five obscure spices you’ll never use again. You just need this list and a fridge that sort of cooperates.

Week One

Monday – Crockpot Tacos
Let the crockpot do the heavy lifting. Dump in meat, seasoning, maybe some tomatoes, and boom—taco night without the skillet babysitting.

Tuesday – Leftovers or Reserves
Translation: fridge roulette or that frozen pizza you “forgot” about.

Wednesday – Leftovers or Reserves
Yes, again. You deserve it.

Thursday – Leftovers or Reserves
See above.

Friday – Salsa Chicken
Chicken, salsa, crockpot. It shreds itself. If only the laundry did.

Saturday – Leftovers or Reserves
The theme is intentional.

Sunday – One-Pan Chicken Fajita Bake
Chop, toss, bake. Minimal effort, maximum flavor. No stovetop juggling act.

Week Two

Monday – Sheet Pan Sausage, Potatoes & Veggies
Cut, toss, roast. Bonus: your house smells amazing, like you’ve been cooking for hours instead of 20 minutes.

Tuesday – Leftovers or Reserves
Champion-level laziness, rebranded as efficiency.

Wednesday – Bacon & Veggie Fried Rice
Bacon makes everything better. Toss it with rice and veggies, and suddenly leftovers feel fancy.

Thursday – Leftovers or Reserves
Nothing like a break day to make Friday’s meal feel even easier.

Friday – Crockpot Creamy Ranch Chicken
Chicken, ranch packet, cream cheese, done. If your crockpot had a fan club, this would be the poster child.

Saturday – Leftovers or Reserves
Consider it a chef’s night off.

Sunday – (Optional Swap Night)
Tired of chicken? Grab something from reserves or takeout without the guilt. The system’s built to bend.

Why This Works

  • Built-in leftovers mean you don’t waste food or energy.
  • Reserve-friendly lets you swap in pantry/freezer staples on the hard days.
  • Minimal chopping, maximum flavor because you’ve got better things to do than wrestle with 15 ingredients.

This isn’t about perfect dinners. It’s about feeding yourself and your people without burning all your spoons in the process. And honestly? That’s more impressive than any five-course meal.

👉 Want the full recipes and grocery list? Scroll down . Dinner crisis = solved. Take care of yourselves, and each other!

recipes
Groceries
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Things I’ve Googled at 2 AM That Made Perfect Sense at the Time

JoLeave a comment

A journey through my search history and the untamed wilderness of my insomniac brain

You know that moment when you’re lying in bed, brain absolutely feral with thoughts that feel like life-or-death urgent? When sleep is for the weak and your mind is a caffeinated hamster running full speed on a wheel made of pure chaos? When every random thought feels like the key to unlocking the mysteries of existence?

Welcome to my 2 AM Google searches – where logic goes to die and curiosity runs completely unhinged.

The “This Will Definitely Keep Me Awake Until Dawn” Category

“Do fish get thirsty and if so how do they drink underwater without drowning” This question possessed my soul for THREE HOURS. I went from fish biology to marine ecosystems to somehow reading about the Mariana Trench. My brain decided fish hydration was the hill I would die on. At 2 AM, this was the most important scientific inquiry of our time.

“What happens if you never cut your toenails ever in your entire life” Started innocent. Ended with me learning about 19th century burial practices and somehow getting emotionally invested in the story of a man who grew his fingernails for 66 years. I have regrets.

The Health Anxiety Rabbit Hole of Doom

“Left eyelid twitching morse code am I receiving messages from beyond” Started as concern about eye twitching. Escalated to wondering if my eyelid was trying to communicate. Googled morse code translations. My eyelid was apparently saying “SOS” which felt about right.

“Why does my knee sound like Rice Krispies when I stand up” I’m in my 40s. Things crack. But at 2 AM, my knee clicking was obviously the first domino in my body’s systematic shutdown. WebMD told me I had seventeen different terminal conditions. I had coffee and mysteriously felt better.

The “Important Research” That Consumed My Soul

“Difference between cemetery and graveyard and why this matters at 3 AM” Apparently it’s about church affiliation. This felt like CRITICAL information at the time. I was prepared to debate burial ground terminology with anyone who challenged me.

“Do cows have best friends and if so do they get lonely and is this why I’m sad” Cows DO have best friends! They form complex social bonds and experience grief when separated! This made me cry actual tears about cow friendship and question my own social connections. Spent an hour reading about bovine emotional intelligence.

“Can cats sense when you’re lying to them?”
Because obviously I need my judgmental feline to approve every life choice.

The Food Safety Investigation Unit

“Pizza left out overnight: food poisoning timeline and acceptable risk calculation” Had to mathematically determine if leftover pizza was worth potential gastrointestinal consequences. Created mental risk/benefit analysis charts. Pizza won. Always wins.

The Philosophical Crisis at Dawn

“What color is Wednesday and why does this feel urgent” Don’t have synesthesia but was absolutely convinced Wednesday has a specific color that I NEEDED to identify. Found entire forums debating weekday colors. People are passionate about this. Wednesday is apparently yellow. Crisis averted. Guys ALL days have colors! Why has no one ever mentioned this?

The Career Change Research Phase

“Can you train squirrels as personal assistants legal implications” There was a particularly intelligent-looking squirrel outside my window. My brain saw potential. Googled squirrel intelligence, training methods, and workplace discrimination laws regarding rodent employees. then once I looked that up “Do squirrels have existential dread?” Probably. And they’re judging my parenting choices. George has a family of his own now so I feel his judging eyes.

The Current Situation

Right now, as I write this at (checks clock) 2:47 AM, I have seventeen browser tabs open including:

  • “Do penguins have knees” (they do!)
  • “Why does my brain do this to me sleep deprivation psychology”
  • “Can you train your circadian rhythm through sheer force of will”
  • “Is 3 AM the witching hour or am I just dramatic”

My search history reads like the diary of someone slowly losing their grip on reality while simultaneously becoming the world’s leading expert on random trivia that absolutely no one asked for.

But here’s the thing – my 3 AM brain might be absolutely unhinged, but it’s also endlessly curious, wildly creative, and never boring. Sure, I could use this time to sleep like a normal person, but then I wouldn’t know that cows have feelings, fish don’t get thirsty (probably), and there are people who have mathematically calculated rubber duck bathtub capacity.

My insomniac research spirals might be chaotic, but they’re MY chaotic research spirals, and honestly? The world is a more interesting place when you know completely useless information about everything.

Tonight’s 3 AM search prediction: “Why do I keep doing this to myself” immediately followed by “Do octopi dream and if so what about”

Please tell me your 3 AM Google searches are equally unhinged. I need to know I’m not the only one whose brain treats bedtime as research time. What’s the weirdest rabbit hole you’ve fallen down in the middle of the night?

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The ADHD Shopping Experience: How I Went for Milk and Came Home with a Succulent, Three Notebooks, and No Milk

JoLeave a comment

A play-by-play of my brain vs. reality, or: Why simple errands are never simple

Setting the Scene: Just need milk. One item. Simple mission. What could possibly go wrong?

In the Parking Lot

ADHD Brain: “Okay, milk. Just milk. Wait, should I make a list? No, it’s just ONE thing. But what if I see something else we need while I’m there? Maybe I should text hubby and ask… no, that’s ridiculous. It’s MILK. But what kind of milk? 2% or whole? Did we discuss this? Should I check the fridge from here? Can’t do that. Focus. MILK. M-I-L-K. Got it.”

Fibromyalgia Body: “Why does every parking space require a trek equivalent to hiking the Appalachian Trail? And why is it windy? Wind makes everything hurt more.”

What Actually Happened: Sat in my car for 5 minutes trying to remember if we needed 2% or whole milk, googled “difference between 2% and whole milk nutritionally” fell down a rabbit hole about dairy farming, got distracted by a text from my mom, completely forgot why I had googled dairy farming, and finally got out of the car having made zero progress on the milk question.

Entering the Store

ADHD Brain: “Straight to dairy section. Do not pass Go. Do not collect impulse purchases. Laser focus. I am a milk-seeking missile.”

Fibromyalgia Body: “Of course I grabbed the cart with the wobbliest wheel in existence. Every step is sending shock waves through my joints. This cart sounds like a dying pterodactyl.”

Bipolar Brain: “Actually, this is kind of fun! Look at all the possibilities! So many choices! I love having choices!”

What Actually Happened: Grabbed the first cart without testing it (rookie mistake), immediately got distracted by the seasonal display of Halloween decorations prominently displayed in August, spent three minutes judging the capitalist machine that pushes holidays earlier each year, then realized I was still standing at the front of the store holding a cart that sounded like it was powered by wounded animals.

Stop #1: The Pharmacy Section

ADHD Brain: “Wait, didn’t I need to pick up that prescription? When was that due? Was it today or tomorrow? Better check while I’m here. Multitasking!”

Fibromyalgia Body: “Standing in lines is torture. Why does every person in front of me have the most complicated prescription issue in pharmacy history?”

What Actually Happened: Joined the pharmacy line without checking if I actually had a prescription ready, discovered I didn’t, but got into a fascinating conversation with the pharmacist about medication timing, learned three new things about drug interactions, forgot why I came to the store entirely, then remembered MILk when I saw the refrigerated section behind the pharmacy counter.

The Succulent Section (How Is This Even a Section?)

ADHD Brain: “Ooh, plants! I could be a plant person! Look at this tiny perfect one – it probably needs rescuing from this fluorescent wasteland. I would give it a good home. I’d name it Gerald. Gerald deserves better than this. I’ll just—NO. MILK. FOCUS. But Gerald is so small and perfect…”

Bipolar Brain (manic whispering): “Plants are scientifically proven to improve mental health! This could be your new hobby! You deserve nice things! Gerald could be the first of many! Think of the Instagram potential!”

Fibromyalgia Body: “Bending over to look at these tiny plants is making my back scream, but Gerald IS pretty cute…”

What Actually Happened: Bought four succulents (Gerald, Susan, Peter,and one I didn’t name because I was trying to show restraint), plus a decorative pot that cost more than the plants, and mentally planned their placement in every room of my house despite historically being a plant serial killer.

Stop #2: The Drive-Through Coffee (Because Obviously)

ADHD Brain: “I should get coffee for this epic grocery mission. Caffeine will help me focus on the milk objective. This is strategic, not procrastination.”

Fibromyalgia Body: “My head is starting to hurt. Coffee will help. Coffee fixes everything.”

Bipolar Brain: “Treat yourself! You’re doing great! You deserve a fancy drink!”

What Actually Happened: Ordered a complicated seasonal latte, paid for it, thanked the barista, drove off immediately, got three blocks away before realizing I never actually received my coffee, circled back through the drive-through again to explain my ADHD brain to a confused teenager, got my coffee and a pitying look, then sat in the parking lot for 10 minutes mentally writing this exact blog post.

The Notebook Aisle (My Natural Habitat)

ADHD Brain: “These are on SALE! I always need notebooks! What if I run out of places to write my brilliant thoughts? What if this specific type gets discontinued forever and I never find another notebook that feels this perfect in my hands? This is an INVESTMENT.”

Bipolar Brain: “Look at all these possibilities! You could start journaling again! Or write that novel! Or organize your life! Each notebook could be a fresh start!”

What Actually Happened: Bought notebooks in three different sizes for “different purposes” – one for grocery lists (ironic, considering), one for “important thoughts,” and one for daily planning that I’ll definitely use this time, unlike the other twelve identical notebooks at home. Spent fifteen minutes arranging them in my cart by color.

At Checkout

ADHD Brain: “Mission accomplished! Wait… what was my mission? Milk! Did I get milk? I feel like I’m forgetting something important. Why do I have plants? OH RIGHT, Gerald!”

Fibromyalgia Body: “Why is this checkout line moving so slowly? My feet are killing me. Should have gotten a scooter cart.”

Cashier: “Did you find everything you needed today?”

Me: “Everything except what I came for!”

What Actually Happened: Paid $47 for succulents, notebooks, Halloween candy (forgot to mention grabbing that), fancy soap that “smelled like my childhood,” and a magazine about organizing your life. No milk. Not even close to milk.

Back Home

Family: “Did you get milk?”

Me: “I got… life lessons? And Gerald.”

Family: “Who’s Gerald?”

Me: “My new succulent son. Also, we still need milk.”

ADHD Brain: “But look how happy Gerald looks on the windowsill! This was basically a success!”

The Moral of the Story: Sometimes the journey is more important than the destination. Sometimes that journey involves adopting plant children and buying notebooks you don’t need. And sometimes you just have to go back to the store tomorrow for milk, but with Gerald watching over you from his new pot. Til next time gang, take care of yourselves, and each other.